TAMPA, Fla. — Attendees at a local death metal show Saturday night were leery of a suspicious man wearing a Six Feet Under t-shirt, who was thought to be either an undercover cop or lead singer Chris Barnes, several baffled camo short-wearing metal fans report.
“No self-respecting death metal fan would ever wear a Six Feet Under shirt in public unless they were a narc or the founding member of the band,” said showgoer Rachel Dunsmore. “It was extremely hard to tell which it was though. The dreadlocks, paired with the fact that he was clearly there alone, made me think it was most definitely Chris Barnes. But the completely unnatural way he held his beer made me think he was a cop pretending to be a death metal fan. Also, he kept talking directly into his shirt as if he had a wire on him. That could still be Chris though. Can’t be too sure.”
The man in question seemed irritated that anyone would confuse him for law enforcement or a metal vocalist.
“In all my years on the force, I mean in the metal community, I’ve never heard anything more silly than any of this,” said Justin DiBella. “I’m just here to enjoy the death metal music in person as any loyal enthusiast of this genre would do. It’s outrageous! So outrageous in fact, that I am going to ask around to see if anyone has any illegal drug paraphernalia on them, so that I can partake in being high during the festivities.”
Six Feet Under singer Chris Barnes was fed up with the lack of respect among metalheads.
“Ever since the first SFU album came out, I’ve heard stories from our dozens of fans saying they get called out, accused, or made fun of for repping the band,” said Barnes. “I myself can’t even go anywhere without some knucklehead asking me to scream a certain vowel or reading them their Miranda rights as they point and laugh. But at any rate, at least I can say I was in Cannibal Corpse for a while I guess, even though many people believe being in Six Feet Under cancels out Cannibal Corpse.”
At press time, suspicions grew even further after DiBella was seen at another show wearing a Five Finger Death Punch shirt.
There’s an age-old axiom that says something in the way of “if your whole band decides to quit all at once after your last record, maybe it’s time to hit the pause button on this project for a while, Art.” Everclear’s “Welcome to the Drama Club” is a prime example of not following that advice. Though the effort put forth by Alexakis and whoever all the new guys are is apparent, the album as a whole just doesn’t feel substantial, and it’s fair for all but the most ardent of Everclear fans to give it a miss.
If we were to ask Neil deGrasse Tyson about “Invisible Stars,” he’d probably tell us some bullshit about how “stars are inherently not visible as they have in fact burned out many millennia before now and what we perceive to be stars are merely refracted light beams from long dead celestial entities.” And then we’d say “no, Neil. We mean the Everclear album ‘Invisible Stars.’” To which he would probably respond with something like “…meh …no thanks.”
In a way, it’s heartening to see a band that entered its greatest hits era decades ago still pumping out some fresh songs every now and again. Heartening – not particularly interesting or good by nearly any standard – but heartening. That’s what “Black Is the New Black” is. Heartening.
“Slow Motion Daydream” came about in that weird period of swelling nostalgia for the suburbs that was the early 2000s. It’s also when the band was at their (inarguably) most creatively exhausted and in desperate need of some time to refresh (see “Welcome To the Drama Club” above to recall how that turned out). But even at their absolute end, this last record from the classic Everclear lineup does have a few high points that are worth revisiting.
Alright, we’re just gonna say this: that “Rock Star” movie with Mark Wahlberg in it ruined that fucking song. Like, the song wasn’t phenomenal otherwise, but that movie absolutely wrecked it. We suppose we should be thankful that it was that song and not one of the multiple much better songs on this record that Marky Mark decided to rear-end, but still, fuck that movie.
“So Much For the Afterglow” is an altogether good album. It executes the band’s familiar sound well and includes a couple of the band’s biggest hits. However, it suffers from a condition that we in the music business call “same old shit but, like, just a bit worse -itis.” This is a common affliction for band’s attempting to capitalize on their previous success (most likely because they didn’t realize just how quickly mortgage payments can stack up). Still, this record does what it does well enough that it is worth many re-listens for anyone willing to lower their standards slightly.
The phrase “criminally underrated” actually doesn’t get thrown around enough these days. But if it were to be applicable anywhere it’s definitely Everclear’s debut album “World of Noise.” Though it has remained largely unknown to the general public, even after the band’s later success, almost no other record better embodies society’s three-month-long interest in cowpunk (and what the hell was up with that era?). But mainly this album shows off a band with tremendous potential to write some really good rock songs in their career.
The first installment in Alexakis’ “find yourself” phase was a well-executed reinvention of Everclear’s previously established sound. After years of perfecting the vaguely-punk alterna-cow branch of the grunge movement, the band came back with this series of pop-infused songs that manage to be equal parts “laid back melodies” and “punishingly depressing lyrics.” “Songs from an American Movie Vol. One” is songwriting at its finest, and an excellent example of how to ward off creative stagnation after your band has been around for the better part of a decade.
Here we have the sweet spot that a lot of band’s from this time found themselves in. Not yet famous but hungry and capable, and riding the crest of the alternative rock wave that was flooding the mainstream. Everclear brought it all together on this one, combining their cowpunk roots (and again, what the hell was up with that era?) with developed songwriting and catchy rock riffs that produced some of the band’s most insightful songs to date. And yes, this is the record with “Santa Monica” on it, so if you’re a fairweather Everclear fan who needs no other reason why this should be in the number one spot, there you go.
