CALGARY, Alberta — A dog cohabitating with some local punks announced that he’s fed up with constantly being falsely accused of vomiting inside the house,…
BURLINGTON, Vt. — Local jam band enthusiast Melody Meadows chose to name her new puppy Bowie as an homage to one of her favorite Phish…
So, you don’t want to fly home for Thanksgiving but need to avoid the Greek tragedy level guilt trip you’ll receive from your mother if…
MILWAUKEE — Local suburban father Dave Johnson made history after inadvertently performing the greatest rock and roll drum solo of all time on the willing…
RCA Records has achieved a new form of notoriety this year with the recent salacious biographical crime drama/softcore porn flick “Monsters: The Lyle and Erik…
OAKLAND, Calif. — The adoption form for an elderly dog with gangrene at Pups in Paradise Animal Shelter required everyone in the rescuer’s household to…
LIVINGSTON, Tenn. — Local police officer Brad Jenkins vocally expressed concern that illegal immigrants were in town eating all of the neighborhood dogs he was…
Last night America witnessed the first and possibly only debate between two presidential hopefuls. One of them, former president Trump, came down pretty hard on…
PARIS — The Olympic men’s street skateboarding final was interrupted mid-competition by a visibly flustered woman who said the sounds were scaring her dog, sources…
CHICAGO — Local pooch Hamburger is reportedly hiding under his home’s kitchen table from Fourth of July fireworks, not due to fear of the sound,…
NASHUA, N.H. – Rebecca Sanders, girlfriend of local punk Ben Stumpf, allegedly puts on a Henry Rollins spoken word record before leaving for work each…
PIERRE, S.D. – South Dakota Governor and potential Trump 2024 running mate Kristi Noem tried to save face after admitting to shooting her dog by…
LOS ANGELES – Local millennial woman, Jane Torrio was left stunned and envious after discovering how much easier, effective, and better her cat’s health insurance…
Okay, so you’ve called time-out and are wasting everyone’s precious time when they could be watching a thrilling yet family-friendly game of high school basketball.…
GARDEN CITY, Kan. — Local singer of punk band Salmonella Handjob surprised a crowd recently by holding their replacement drummer up by the scruff of…