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Your Weekly Hardcoroscopes

Aries (March 21-April 19) Cool it, Aries. Just because you watched Childish Gambino’s “This Is America” once doesn’t mean anyone gives a shit about the…

Crust Punk Fills Uneven Beard With Patches

NEW YORK — Local crust punk Phil “Rat Face” Howland took creative measures last week to turn his uneven beard into a stronger representation of…