Man Can’t Tell if Friend’s Art Show Surrealist or Bad
NEW YORK — While attending a friend’s high profile art show, local man Brian Jacobs was left dumbfounded after being…
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Ben Friedman
337 stories found
Help! I Want to Recommend Angine de Poitrine to everyone, but I Can’t Pronounce Their Name
When I first saw the video of Angine de Poitrine playing live on KEXP, I honestly found the whole thing…
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Man Referring to Everyone as ‘Cunt’ After Two Week Australian Vacation
SAN DIEGO — A local man who recently returned from a two week vacation in Australia has brought back some…
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Aging Punk Worried He’s Getting Too Old to Sell Out
LOS ANGELES — Paul Wallace, a 43-year-old punk from Boyle Heights, recently came to the sobering conclusion that he might…
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Report: 75% of Boomer Men Adding Instagram Porn Bots to Their Living Wills and Testaments
WASHINGTON — AARP Magazine released a startling study this week that approximately 75% of boomer babies are changing their living…
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Hardcore Show Doorman Enforcing Strict 14 Tattoo Minimum
ASBURY PARK, N.J. — Entry to a hardcore show at a popular venue came to a standstill after the doorman…
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How Mudflaps Gave Me Unrealistic Expectations About How Often Calvin Pisses on the Yankees Logo
As far back as I can remember, I have hated the New York Yankees. I hate the joyless corporatism of…
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Venue Changes Name, Owner, Staff Mid-Show
MILWAUKEE, Wis. — Attendees of a local punk show were left confused and disoriented after the venue changed its name,…
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Trust Fund Hipsters Return To Ancestral Coachella Grounds to Mate
INDIO, Cali. - As the sun broke over the mountains of the Coachella Valley this morning, thousands of first-day festival…
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McDonald’s Overhauls Deal Menu With $17 ‘Fuck You Burger’
CHICAGO — McDonald’s announced that the fast food chain would be undergoing a massive overhaul of their affordable deal menu…
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