HASTINGS, Mich. — Concert ASL interpreter Alyssa Morgan became an instant celebrity after wowing the crowd doing the jerk-off motion the entirety of Kid Rock’s set, venue employees have confirmed.
“I take a lot of pride in helping remove barriers for the deaf and hard of hearing so they can enjoy entertainment just like everyone else. But then the Kid Rock show happened, and he barely got three minutes into his set before my brain couldn’t handle his MAGA bloviating and I just interpreted it via the jerk-off motion,” said Morgan. “I’m not wasting precious time and energy interpreting him pretending to be a redneck or bragging about helicopter rides with Pete Hegseth, but I’m throwing in a few eye rolls here and there to spice things up. Hey, at least I’m getting my cardio in for the week.”
Kid Rock himself was impressed by the reaction Morgan was getting.
“She totally gets it! Nothing like 90 minutes straight of doing the Trump dance to really drive home what I’m all about. The audience was totally nodding along with her too. Not gonna lie, I’m a little jealous she stole the show,” said Kid Rock. “I’m going to see if she wants to tour with us. All the people in the front were laughing their heads off, which was kinda weird but at least they were having a good time.”
Advocates for the hard of hearing fully supported Morgan’s lyrical interpretations.
“We’re very happy that more venues are being inclusive, allowing deaf attendees to enjoy music and entertainment that was previously inaccessible. ASL interpreters have also been helpful in cutting through absolutely ass lyrics and cringe-inducing speeches between songs,” said National Association for the Deaf rep Kevin Reynolds. “The biggest successes have come from signing for butt rock and nü metal acts from the 2000s, because it’s already bad enough that able-bodied people can hear the music. I once saw a guy sign for Breaking Benjamin, and he just punched a sheet of drywall the whole set. Now that’s art.”
During the encore, Morgan added the gagging motion as Kid Rock started singing the part about sex with underage girls in “Cool Daddy Cool.”
