Bill Conway
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RALEIGH, N.C. — Federal Immigration Officer Ronny Pimmental once again woke up in terror after experiencing a recurring nightmare of…
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Patrick Coyne
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WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump announced yesterday that he had deployed the National Guard to Roku City, the fictional cityscape…
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Tim Graham
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BURLINGTON, Mass. — ICE agent Wayne Almeida attempted to pick up women at a local bar by showing off his…
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LOS ANGELES — Local ICE agent Mitch Holsen admitted he wept a few tears of joy after receiving an emotional…
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Char Byram
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BOISE, Idaho — Local piece of shit Jesse Schweitzer was charged with impersonating a police officer after assaulting his entrapped…
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Steve Packosky
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BURGETTSTOWN, Pa. — The mosh pit at a concert by popular metal band Pantera doubled as a team-building activity for…
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GAINESVILLE, Fla. — Local rap-rock band Antagonyze released their latest single “Cop Kisser” which they say should act as a…
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WASHINGTON — President Trump announced a new program to help boost ICE enlistment numbers by promising to forgive any debt…
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Ryan Danley
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TUCSON, Ariz. — A local ICE agent’s wife Karen Wilkins is really hoping her own family gets torn apart, after…
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Tim Graham
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NORTH ATTLEBORO, Mass. — Several youths were ordered to stop playing with miniature skateboards by very small police officers outside…
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