This Will Destroy You is perhaps the quintessential instrumental post-rock outfit of the 2000s. They play shimmering, guitar-driven compositions, they lean hard into the loud-soft-loud dynamic, their name is ridiculous, and they put out the most cinematically-sweeping, gut-wrenching work this side of Explosions in the Sky. Unlike Explosions in the Sky, however, their albums sound different from one another.
They are also a band that rejected the post-rock label in the most aggressive terms possible, as prickly former bassist Donovan Jones infamously muttered “fuck post-rock and fuck being called post-rock” in 2010, presumably while chain-smoking unfiltered Camels.
They have seven studio albums and a live album that we’re going to discuss, and a handful of splits, EPs, and rarities/B-side collections that we’re probably going to ignore.
7. New Others Part 2 (2018)
This one is notable for being a surprise release that just sort of appeared on YouTube a week or two after “New Others Part One,” and needless to say, that was a treat for fans any way you slice it. It’s also notable for being the only TWDY record (I double-checked) that starts with a fast, hard-rocking passage and then settles into a slow, ominous, atmospheric dirge. You can almost hear Joey Ramone yelling onetwothreefour before the album kicks off. All of their other records do precisely the opposite. It’s an okay album, but it sounds like a collection of outtakes and B-sides, which, to be honest, it probably originally was anyway.
Play it Again: “Cascade”
Skip It: “Sound of Your Death”
6. Vespertine (2020)
Death metal fans lost their minds when Blood Incantation, on the heels of a breathlessly acclaimed record, turned around in 2022 and made a lengthy EP of straight-up ambient synth music, but TWDY really beat them to the dramatic-genre-shifting punch by dropping their usual doom-drone-metal atmospherics to create this commissioned soundtrack to a Michelin-star rated restaurant in California, also called Vespertine. It’s fine in itself, and good for meditation or background music while you’re working or for putting on as a sort of lullaby to help cranky four-year-olds finally fall the hell asleep already, but it’s so far outside of TWDY’s usual work that it’s almost impossible to give it a legitimate ranking here.
Play it Again: “Kitchen” – There’s a really memorable reverb-soaked guitar figure here that, despite being simple enough that a 10-year-old who just learned “Hot Cross Buns” could probably nail it, is achingly beautiful.
Skip It: “Building” – Yeah, all of the songs are named after different parts of the restaurant, which, whatever. The whole concept is pretentious, what can you do?
5. New Others Part 1
It’s clear that this was recorded in the same session as “New Others Part 2,” but the songwriting is more cohesive and the shifts in dynamics feel more organic. Track likes “Syncage” play with synthesized effects more dramatically than the band has in the past, and even has some abrasive moments that sound like a mid-90s Nine Inch Nails remix, minus all the sadomasochistic “I’m Trent Reznor, woe is me” histrionics. As a whole, this record has a lot of the ambient stuff that would show up in Vespertine, but with enough dynamic range and variety that it still feels more or less like classic TWDY. A solid album.
Play It Again: “Weeping Window” – This is the band at their best, and if you check out the live studio version sponsored by Walrus Audio, you’ll get a nice glimpse at how, despite seeming like a studio band through and through, they can absolutely, well, destroy when they play live.
Skip It: “Melted Jubilee”
4. Young Mountain (2006)
A triumph of a debut. Opener “Quiet” is basically the band’s mission statement, at least for their earliest work, showing off their ability to turn simple, low-key motifs into anthems that you can head-bang to in slow motion. “The World is our _____” is a master class in how to use heavy delay effects on a lead guitar without seeming overly precious, and when the power chords kick in at 2:40, they feel 100% earned, rather than like someone said “Oh, hey, we should probably make it all loud and rockin’ now.” There’s a kind of simplicity to the album as a whole, both in production and songwriting, but it’s still a deeply satisfying record to come back to, and has the bonus feature of sticking the landing perfectly in the final moments of the final track, which just happens to be our “Play it Again” pick.
Play It Again: “There Are Some Remedies Worse than the Disease”
Skip It: “Grandfather Clock” – This track sounds utterly out of place. It doesn’t work with the rest of the record, and doesn’t sound like TWDY at all. It’s not a bad song on its own merits, but music like this has to create a sense of thematic cohesion on each album in order to work, and this one sticks out like the sorest of thumbs.
3. Tunnel Blanket (2011)
This is a really popular album among fans. We wouldn’t so much as raise an eyebrow if someone else were to put it at #1 or #2. Please bear that in mind before you carpet-bomb the comments section. This was a serious shift for the band from guitar-forward post-rock songs that could (and did) score movies and TV like “Moneyball” and “CSI” (not to mention promo segments for the 2010 Winter Olympics), to brooding, dense, doom-inflected drone metal. Opener “Little Smoke” is among their greatest songs, a 12-minute slow-burn monster that starts with seemingly-endless atmospheric synth figures before just sort of tipping over into a raging wall of cacophonous dread that barely seems to crack 30 beats per minute. “Glass Realms” is a preview of their more ambient work to come. There’s nothing skippable here. “Tunnel Blanket” must be experienced as a single work. It’s a thoroughly dark and somber – almost depressive, really – album, with very little reprieve.
Play It Again: “Little Smoke” and “Killed the Lord, Left for the New World”
Skip It: Don’t. Each song needs the ones around it if you want the full experience
Honorable Mention: Live in Reykjavik, Iceland (2013)
Oddly enough, if you’re only going to own one TWDY album, it should probably be this one. It feels less like a live album than a greatest hits collection of their material up to and including “Tunnel Blanket.” The band already sounds atmospheric and reverb-laden in everything they put out, so the live setting doesn’t change much. They play the songs on here totally straight. Even the longer, multi-part ones are pretty indistinguishable from their studio counterparts, which is a little ironic because their live shows around this time were often bogged down in abstract noise experiments; you could barely pick out a riff or melody. Apparently, on the flight to Iceland, they decided to start playing more traditional live sets again, and what results is a simple compilation of most of their best songs at that point, if not so much a capturing of what they usually sounded like live in this era.
2. Self-Titled (2008)
If you’re going to introduce TWDY to someone who’s never heard them, this is the album to insist they start with. Its structure, songwriting, and production are all extremely similar to “Young Mountain,” but with notable improvement in each of those areas. It’s a mix of songs that are darn near catchy – the riff to “Threads,” especially, will stick with you for quite some time – and songs that unfold in waves of abstract noise for what seems like ten minutes at a time. The record is perfectly balanced in every way, a Rosetta Stone of post-rock, and the last album for which they’d be satisfied with that formula before moving into a far more experimental direction.
Play It Again: “Burial on the Presidio Banks” – Big, emotive crescendos might be a well-known commodity in this genre, but the album-finishing fortissimo-fueled madness on this one is as good as it gets.
Skip It: Nothing
1. Another Language (2014)
If “Tunnel Blanket” was essentially a press release announcing “We’re not trying to just be a new version of Explosions in the Sky,” then Another Language announces “But we’re also not going to be pigeonholed into this whole doomgaze thing.” This record finds a happy medium that is beyond simple classification, blending ambient, metal, dream pop, and avant-garde noise into a fully-integrated final product. You simply can’t see or hear the stitches that connect these different genres. It’s fluid and perfectly executed. It’s an overwhelming and deeply beautiful 47-minute experience. This maybe isn’t the best record of theirs to hear before you’re acquainted with their vibe, but once you are so acquainted, it’s the best one, period. Splurge on the vinyl, kick back, and let it wash over you.
Play It Again: Yes
Skip It: No
Literally fucking peanuts. How am I supposed to eat my feelings with goddamn peanuts?! My problems are way bigger than peanuts Virginia! I appreciate the effort you put into boiling them for some reason but pass.
What do you get when you cross-breed Bing cherries with Van cherries? Yeah, still just some dumb cherries. I didn’t come all the way up to the mountains for my health, so why are you serving me this?
When I heard what was on the menu in Oregon I couldn’t wait to get there. I couldn’t believe I was about to devour the flesh of disgraced crack-smoking former mayor Marion Barry. I had so many questions, like how did the state’s most celebrated food become human flesh? And Why the former District of Columbia mayor specifically? How did they manage to keep supplying flesh from just one person long enough for it to become a staple? But mostly, I was just super pumped to finally cross that line and commit the ultimate taboo. Well, turns out it’s some dumb fruit.
The food that stopped an entire generation from being able to afford a home! Definitely not the economic turmoil inevitable in late-stage capitalism, nope, it was avocado toast and woke lattes. The best avocados in the country can in fact be found in California, and while they are deceptively fatty, it’s the good kind of fat. I don’t deserve the good kind of fat.
Let me get this straight. I have a hole in me. An empty, corrosive void that leaves me feeling broken and incomplete all of the time, and I’m supposed to fill that void with corn? Corn. Look, it’s a perfectly fine side, but I’ve got demons to suppress and a cob can only hold so much butter Iowa.
We all love salmon, and salmon fresh from Alaska is the best Salmon you can get. Good enough to justify a $700 10-hour flight to Alaska? Well, no, but try to remember life is meaningless.
More damned corn! Apparently, South Carolina’s flagship delicacy is this weird corn and shrimp “stew” that doesn’t even have any broth! How the hell did you people get so dumb and weird eating food this healthy?! I’ll never eat my feelings at this rate.
Yes, it’s a donut, and all donuts are an excellent source of grease, carbohydrates, and fleeting comfort, but this particular variety is overrated. They’re usually cakey and the cinnamon and sugar dusting does all the heavy lifting. Honestly, after the 10th one I barely wanted to finish the dozen.
New England clam chowder is delicious, and the chowder they serve in Massachusetts is indeed a cut above the rest, but is it really worth the price of admission? I.E., being in Massachussets? Few things are.
These are french fries served with a secret recipe sauce that tastes like Thousand Island dressing and is, of course, Thousand Island dressing. It’s a greasy good way to drown your sorrows, but like, did I really need to come all the way to Utah for this?
You know how Superman has Bizzaro? Well, pizza has this. Nothing this bad for you should taste this terrible, but I will say that after forcing just two slices down my gullet I’m too logey to dwell on the fact that my own son hates me.
The “Juicy Lucy” is a cheeseburger with a twist: The cheese is in the middle! It’s delicious, and a fitting reminder that what’s terrible, toxic, and corrosive about me is on the inside.
As a broken person who has burned more bridges than he could ever hope to build, I love me some pie. Pecan pie is an open pie made with brown sugar, pecans, brown sugar, butter, and of course brown sugar. I would never say no to a slice of pecan pie, and it’s only ranked lower than other pies on this list because of the potential health benefits of nuts. I do not deserve antioxidants, and I do not deserve love.
You know what goes great on meat? More meat. If you disagree, congratulations, your serotonin levels are just fine, but me? I’m getting a Coney dog.
Traditionally this dessert gravy is served on biscuits, but as a man who refused to take over a 250-year-old family business and sabotaged 4 marriages, I’ve never been one for tradition. When I’m in Arkansas I pour this stuff over everything. Pancakes, turkey, my own head, it doesn’t matter. Nothing matters.
If you think biscuits are a dumbass state food you’re thinking about that Pillsbury trash. Real home-cooked biscuits are warm, fluffy, near-perfect substitutions for love, with ungodly amounts of butter baked right on the top. That’s not to say I won’t be slapping more butter on these bad boys when they’re served. I’m trying to fill an emotional void, not start my day right.
A lot of people say New York is all about pizza, but if you look hard enough you can find decent New York-style pizza just about anywhere. Trying to find New York-style bagels outside the Northeast on the other hand will drive you to madness.
This food was designed to combat the bleakness of West Virginian coal miner life, so it can more than handle whatever menial problem I’m blowing out of proportion on any given day.
As a man slowly coming to terms with the fact that he’s almost 50 and never going to write that novel, I love me some pie. In this graham cracker-crusted meringue-topped version curdelling is part of the process. There’s a metaphor for my shitty life in there somewhere, but I’m too full of pie to think of it.
Nothing against Mrs. Buttersworth, but she just can’t hold a candle to the rich shame eating you can do with the dark, complex sugars created by naturally occurring Vermont maple syrup.
It’s basically a slightly fancier hot pocket.
These cookies are Thin Mints but with raspberry. Thin Mints are the real deal. Raspberry Rally is like the Graves-era version of it.
Dulce de Leche is Spanish for “sweet (made) of milk.” Only Glenn will tell people it’s French for “caramel of the leeches.” This will slightly pique the interest of Jerry Only, but not enough to buy any.
These aren’t even cookies. They’re triangular cheddar crackers. What the fuck, Girl Scouts? Get your shit together.
Pinatas look like pure chaos. They’re oatmeal-based accompanied by a fruit filling topped with a cinnamon and sugar glaze that seems to be drizzled on without rhyme or reason. Glenn won’t be able to memorize all of these features and will choke under pressure when asked follow-up questions.
Lemonades are shortbread cookies with lemon icing. If you’re into lemon-flavored treats then this is your holy grail. But if you’re a normal person you’re probably passing on these.
While these cookies may look delicious on the surface, Glenn is going to rattle off the ingredients in his sales pitch for some reason and blow the whole thing. No one wants to know that these cookies contain something called monocalcium phosphate.
Glenn would pronounce these as “car-mel” instead of “care-a-mel” and no customer could get past that.
Aloha Chips had white chocolate in them. Glenn doesn’t know how to sell anything that isn’t the color black. This one will be a real struggle for him.
If you were in the woods and found one of these on the ground, you might think they were bear turds before they were a dessert or late-night snack. Can’t blame Glenn for this one.
Medallions were introduced to the world in the early ‘80s. This will make Glenn reminisce about his time with Samhain. No one will know what he’s talking about because the Venn Diagram of people who listen to Samhain and people who consume Girl Scout cookies is just two separate circles.
These cookies have a little “thank you” note imprinted on top of them. Glenn is not a fan of foods with words. This will be evident during his sales pitch.
This one will throw Glenn for a curveball when it’s time to sell someone on them. After all, he practiced his sales pitches in the mirror with traditional cookies as his main focus. This will be harder than he thought.
Girl Scout S’mores are like regular s’mores only these say their name on them. Glenn believes this is a distraction and that when it’s snack time, it’s not read time. Danzig has a policy to never mix and match these activities.
These cookies had various animals imprinted on them. Glenn would sell them as a “sugary meat substitute” and turn off potential consumers.
Glenn would get hung up on the name of this one. He isn’t sure whether to emphasize the “Scot” part or the “Tea” part and there isn’t anything about it in the Girl Scouts pamphlet he received beforehand. Not even an FAQ or anything.
These little bite-sized cookies are gluten free. Glenn doesn’t really know what that means for sure, but he has a plan to act like he does. It will soon blow up in his face when he mentions that these cookies do not contain gluteal tissue from a horse. He is technically correct about that part.
Cookies with raisins are like pineapple on pizza. Sure, you are technically allowed to eat that, but have you even considered chocolate chips on your pizza slice?
Little Brownies are free from sugar. Finally, a brownie that doesn’t taste like one.
These are lemon wedges coated in powdered sugar. Glenn wouldn’t know where to start with these ones. Instead, he’ll talk shit about Jerry Only for a few minutes before asking how many boxes he should put you down for.
Apple Cinnamons are the Apple Jacks of Girl Scout cookies. Yes, they are technically cookies, but in a world with Cap n’ Crunch and Lucky Charms, why would you settle for this one? Tough sell.
Glenn will mainly focus on the “royale” part of Praline Royales. He knows an unexpected amount about Queen Elizabeth now that she’s dead. Danzig will go on to talk about other famous royal figures who are not alive anymore and their potential to turn into aristocratic zombies.