Here’s the deal. We love Fugazi and we love Minor Threat. We’ve mentioned both bands several times in print because they rule. However, some ice cream eating motherfucker in our comments section had the gall to insinuate that we’ve never heard of Rites of Spring and therefore are ‘fake emo bullshit posers’ simply because we haven’t given them much press. First off, fuck that guy. We don’t give a shit about what he thinks. Secondly, it really bothers us that he called us that.
We should probably take the high road here and just let it go, but we can’t live with the stain this slander has smeared all over us. To prove this asshole wrong and come out on top, we’ve ranked every song from Rites of Spring’s self-titled album and EP, ‘All Through A Life.’ Please don’t tell our therapist. We can’t afford another emergency session.
17. “For Want Of”
There’s likely nothing less punk than enjoying something with over three million streams on Spotify. Because this is arguably the band’s most well-known song, we’re going to err on the side of caution here and place it dead last as to not seem pedestrian. We’re not posers, so we have no way of knowing for sure, but putting a super popular track higher up in the list sure seems like something a poser would do. It would be like ranking “Waiting Room” as the best Fugazi song.
16. “Hain’s Point”
‘Hain’s Point’ is a noble effort, but sounds notably unfinished when compared to the rest of the band’s catalog. Picciotto may feel as though he’s ‘falling through a hole in his heart’ throughout the track, but we just feel like we’re falling through a half-assed song written to fill the tracklist. Maybe we’re being harsh, but the track almost sounds as if they didn’t know they were part of the motherfucking Revolution Summer Movement and that’s unforgivable.
15. “All There Is”
Rites of Spring are often credited as the originators of Emo music. Many point to the band as an example of how far the genre has strayed from its fundamental roots, and they’re usually right. This song, however, is whiny as shit. If you’re attempting to prove to your MCR-loving friend that Emo is more than just breakup songs and bad poetry, you’d be well advised to stay far away from this track.
14. “Hidden Wheel”
This probably would have been a great cut had it been sped up and recorded with the ramshackle intensity of the band’s previous work, but with the cleaned-up sound of their EP, ‘All Through a Life,’ it falls tragically flat. Remember that time you told your rowdy as fuck friend to get his shit together and he corrected his course way too hard? He’s boring as hell now. That’s essentially the deal with this song.
13. “Persistent Vision”
There are some pretty neat backward guitars at the end of this one. We can’t confirm, but we’re pretty positive the Rites Boys were the first band to ever think of incorporating reversed sounds on a track in the entire history of recorded music. That small bit of innovation aside, this song doesn’t offer much else to differentiate it from the herd and isn’t going to send anyone running to the record store for a copy anytime soon.
12. “Theme”
There’s some sort of phaser or flanger or chorus or something on Mike Fellows’ bass during this track. While we’re not sure of the exact stomp-box that was utilized, everyone knows using any effect on bass other than distortion is gross and not punk at all. If we had to guess the ‘theme’ of this track, it would be ‘we just got a bunch of goofy pedals.’ The band would have done well to leave that flashy shit behind. No one likes a showoff, Brendan.
11. “Patience”
Ugh, again with the flanger or phaser or whatever. It just doesn’t sound good, and it never will. If you’re in or starting any kind of band at all, get that shit off of your pedalboard immediately like Picciotto did after Rites of Spring broke up. Despite the aural misstep, this is a fine track. It just doesn’t seem to fit with the band’s overall image or sound and it mostly just makes us want to listen to the more successful permutations of Picciotto’s songwriting in Fugazi’s discography.
10. “All Through A Life”
As the opening track to the band’s final EP, an immediate departure is conveyed in ‘All Through A Life.’ The biggest difference is that it actually sounds kind of listenable. Ian MacKaye’s increased recording skill coupled with a more rehearsed band helped craft a more polished sound. Because we aren’t actually ‘talentless losers with zero integrity,’ as some would have you believe, we think that higher production values equate to worse-sounding music, so down in the lower half it goes.
9. “By Design”
This song is fine. Maybe due to its late position in the original tracklist of the band’s debut, it gives off a bit of an ‘okay, we get the gist’ vibe. There is nothing terrible or even remotely remarkable about this song, which means that guy who called us ‘hacks’ on Instagram last week probably fucking loves it. Sorry, this is a smack-dab-in-the-middle song at best.
8. “Other Way Around”
If you happen to have an original pressing of Rites of Spring’s self-titled LP, you might notice that this song is nowhere to be found. That’s because it was only added when the album was repressed in 1987, a full year after the band dissolved. Because this song wasn’t even readily available when the band was actually active, and the act of adding it as a bonus track for a fresh pressing feels a bit cash grabby, we must rank it lower here no matter how much that riff in the intro fucking shreds.
7. “Drink Deep”
While not the worst song in the world, and clearly a foundational composition for future Fugazi numbers, this track is nearly five minutes long and we have shit to do. Guy Picciotto claims to ‘believe in moments’ during the lengthy and mostly uneventful runtime of ‘Drink Deep.’ Our only wish here is that he would have had less faith in at least two minutes’ worth of the track’s moments while crafting it.
6. “In Silence/Words Away”
Though much of the band’s last EP proved to be a bit underwhelming after their riotous debut, this track has a bit of the familiar edge. Stuck somewhere firmly between Picciotto’s past and future stylistic choices, ‘In Silence/Words Away’ can almost be seen as a fitting swan song to his previous life as a sole frontman before careening wildly into sharing the outsized role in Fugazi. Sorry to ramble, we’ve been listening to a lot of Rites of Spring as you have probably gathered.
5. “Remainder”
If you listen closely, you can almost hear every one of your favorite punk-adjacent bands from the last twenty years being conceived throughout this track, which is one of the more melodic entries into the band’s brief catalog. The outro riff alone likely spawned an entire generation of pop-punk legends. Blame Rites of Spring or praise them depending on your feelings about the FuseTV-era of Emo and Punk, but one thing is certain, they bear nearly all of the responsibility.
4. “Nudes”
Before you start undressing and finding your most flattering selfie angle the next time you receive a text that says “send nudes,” stop and consider that the sender probably just needs help finding a link to Rites of Spring’s classic, ‘Nudes.’ This will potentially save you a ton of embarrassment down the line, and the track’s groove is as undeniable as its lyrics are existential and weird. ‘Nudes’ showcases the band at the near peak of their performative abilities, which is more than we can say for the last time the idiot that called us ‘phonies’ was in the buff.
3. “Spring”
Now that’s how you start a goddamn insanely influential and genre-birthing debut album. ‘Spring’ wastes no time kicking the absolute shit out of you. One blink-and-you’ll-miss-it snare hit and it’s ‘buckle up, fucker.’ At a neck-breaking two-minute run time, a casual listener will barely have time to get back on their feet before the final guitar notes ring out. We’re no casual listeners here, though. In fact, we’re still cleaning up all the shit we knocked over while slam-dancing to this one in the office.
2. “Deeper Than Inside”
Oh fuuuuuuck yeah. This is a ripper that is sure to have you strutting circles around your living room in no time. This one’s got angular riffs, chants a plenty, and a Picciotto voice constantly on the verge of completely going out. There aren’t many songs that more accurately sound like the term “emotive hardcore.” At least not outside of Rites of Spring’s discography, there aren’t.
1. “End on End”
I know we just recently criticized ‘Drink Deep’ for being almost five minutes long, so you’re probably wondering why we put a nearly eight-minute-long song in the top spot. Well, idiot, the reason is that ‘Drink Deep’ is a boring slog, and ‘End on End’ is batshit crazy levels of incredible. If Rites of Spring released this song, and only this song, they would probably be equally if not twice as legendary as they are now. Essentially, ‘End on End’ condenses everything great about the band’s sound into a singular track that could pass for a respectable EP in its own right. Even Dischord Records used the track’s title as the name of the compilation release of their repackaged discography. You literally can’t fight us on this, and we will not be fielding any arguments at this time. (Plus it’s the opening song in “Jump Off a Building.”)
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Samiam later in their career always kind of rode that line between catchy punk and mainstream radio rock and this is the one where that line is crossed. This is a perfectly fine album but it’s also the one that you can almost imagine being played over the loudspeaker at your local supermarket.
After a six-year hiatus, they returned with this album and immediately something seemed off. All the elements are there for the most part but the recording sounds like it was done with a boombox placed in the middle of the practice room. The backlash to this was so bad that they released a remixed version in 2013 to fix the glaring mistakes but even this new version doesn’t really seem to have the goods.
It’s probably unfair to compare a band’s brand-new album to everything they’ve been doing for three previous decades, but then again life isn’t fair. We have to judge this one based solely on the music itself without any rose-colored nostalgia corrupting our judgment. The good news is the verdict is this a really good album with a lot of it sounding like something from their catalog in the late ‘90s.
1990 was a weird year for music. The punk and hardcore bands of the ‘80s had burned themselves out and the Whitesnakes of the world dominated the airwaves. This was the year Samiam released their first full-length and in a way picked up where Hüsker Dü left off even though it may be a little rough in spots.
Maybe it was the fact that nothing happened on Y2K, but by 2000 Samiam seemed to cool their heels a bit and relaxed into a mid-career cruise. Astray is both a little more angsty than its predecessor and also a bit more tame. We spent most of the year 2000 eating through our doomsday rations anyway.
Their second major label release and from a production stance, arguably their best-sounding record. Beebout’s vocals are clean but powerful and you can tell he was really swinging for the fences. This is the soundtrack to a slacker alt road trip to find the best thrift store two states over.
The second album for every band is tricky. While some bands make embarrassing cringe-tastic decisions on their second album (“Let’s add violins!”) Samiam instead solidified their sound and smoothed off just enough of the rough edges from their debut.
Their first major label release and their big breakout which earned them some modest airplay on MTV and even an appearance on the early Jon Stewart Show. The deep pockets of Atlantic Records afforded them better production but luckily they avoided the pitfalls of the overly slick and sanitized sound so many bands seem to fall into once Daddy Music Label opens their wallet.
What a sad fucking album this is but somehow it still makes you feel happy. Well, maybe not happy but possibly less depressed. Is it emo? Shit no. But it’s emotional as fuck. It almost feels like a concept album with the concept being life is shit especially when you’re broke and lonely.
There is no way in hell I’m sharing a vehicle with this man. But I guess if I absolutely have to, this would be my one and only opportunity to push this guy out of a moving car.
The Kiss bassist wouldn’t wear a seatbelt the entire time because, according to him, no one ever did back in his day. This is going to make me wonder how many other basic safety considerations he’s going to forgo on this trip.
The Gorillaz bassist would somehow run over several small animals while driving. It wouldn’t be until the third or fourth time he took out a possum that I’d start to think he was actually intentionally aiming for them. It’s really killing the adventure and wanderlust vibes.
It’ll be six hours into this road trip before Fat Mike informs me that he doesn’t have a driver’s license. Then he’s going to tell me he forgot his wallet. Also his toothbrush, so he’ll have to use mine. Nothing but red flags.
You just know Nikki smells like a combination of hairspray and cigarettes even though I’ve never seen him smoke. The Marlboro aromas are fine, but I draw the line at anything that smells like Axe Body Spray.
Krist is 6’7” so he’s going to be so uncomfortable in my compact car. We’d have to stop every 20 to 30 minutes so he can get out and stretch his legs. Road trips are typically more suitable for short kings.
The Guns N’ Roses bassist has been sober for decades, so I feel like he’s going to judge me when I crack open a few drinks when it’s my turn to drive. I just function better when I’m a few beers deep. Is that so wrong?
The Black Sabbath bassist would complain about gas prices the entire time. Buddy, I know gas was a quarter per gallon in the ‘70s, but that was before the government allowed rampant corporate greed to take over. Get with the program.
The Iron Maiden bassist would throw all of this trash on the floor even though I have a plastic bag for this exact purpose. At least he separates it beforehand. Recycling goes in the passenger side, general garbage in the back, and food scraps go out the window.
White Zombie’s bassist would want to bring her pet snake with her and it’d ride in the backseat. I’m going to be staring at that thing in the rearview mirror the entire time. She’s the reason I’d have to institute a stern “no reptiles” rule on future road trips.
The MxPx bassist would Instagram the entire trip, as if anyone cares we just hit Indiana. He’d even post reels like a total dork. I wouldn’t mind it so much, but he keeps using the hashtag #vanlife and it’s bothering me because we’re in a sedan.
The Korn bassist would be a fine companion on the road to a certain extent, but he’d only consume Red Bulls, Mountain Dew, and Five-Hour Energy the entire way. I’d never see him drink water and I’d start to get worried.
The Strokes bassist would prefer to sit in silence the entire time because he’s “not much of a music fan.” Just what am I supposed to pay attention to while driving?
Les famously took bass to a whole new level. Unfortunately, he’s going to keep bringing that up the entire car ride. I’d have to pretend like I have to take a dump at every single rest stop just to get a break from him.
The Adverts bassist may be iconic in the punk world, but she’d want to hit every roadside attraction in the US. It doesn’t matter that the world’s largest ball of twine is three hours out of our way or the giant statue of Paul Bunyan’s ox is on the other side of the country, Gaye’s bucket list is somehow the priority.
The Clash bassist is extremely British. That means he drives on the opposite side of the road. I generally don’t have a problem with that, but US traffic cops might. Seems like more trouble than it’s worth.
The Talking Heads bassist would pack several charcuterie boards full of cured meats, pâtés, and spreads. That’s fine and all, but she wouldn’t leave any room on the board for Funyuns, which is my go-to road trip snack.
90 minutes into the excursion, the Minutemen bassist is going to ask “Are we there yet?” even though I told him beforehand that this was a cross country trip. Starting to think he’s never seen a map before. That must be why he didn’t seem to quite understand the concept of Wyoming.
Jerry has a whole list of attractions he wants to see along the way, but they’re all Spirit Halloween stores. Jerry, I assure you that the Spirit Halloween in Nebraska has the same stuff as the one in New Jersey.
Somewhere between art rock and screamo lived Angel Hair. They were an awesomely weird band and the fact that they were from hippie-ass Boulder and not the screamo headquarters of San Diego makes them even weirder and more awesomer.
Duncan Barlow spent his youth in Louisville, Kentucky playing in quite a few notable hardcore bands like Endpoint, Guilt, and By The Grace Of God. But as an adult, he moved to Denver, got himself a fancy new hat, and began d.biddle fusing a type of alt-country with stringed instrumentation and emo.
There have been a lot more female-fronted political hardcore bands lately. It’s almost as if on a daily basis our society slips further into a Handmaiden-esque dystopia which for some reason has made a number of women angry, go figure. Keeping the flames of the discontent burning is relative newcomers Faim. Their brand of raw, politically-charged hardcore serves as a soundtrack to smashing the fuck out of the patriarchy.
There came a time in the early 2000s when the math-y, hectic style of hardcore started to reach embarrassing lows (remember those fucking “crabcore” bands?) But there were some bands still holding it down and destroying stages and eardrums. Fear Before The March Of Flames was one of those bands.
Probably the only band on this list your mom approves of. And while they may sound like a cross between Sam Cooke and the sound of a craft distillery opening, they have deep roots in the indie and punk scenes of Denver. We dare you not to toe-tap along to their denim-drenched jams.
Not only do instrumental riff lords Native Daughters have not one, but two, drummers, both drummers play upfront live. They do a post-metal style much in the vein of Pelican and Isis but with the percussive elements taking literal center stage.
Oh look, yet another Colorado band that made our 
Even though their name might make them seem like a juvenile pop-punk band with songs about farting on your mom or whatever, this three-piece from Boulder was pretty serious. Their driving melodic guitar riffs coupled with Aaron Hobbs’ distinctive voice made them stand out from the other emo-tinged bands of the time. Two of the members would later form the more austerely named Acrobat Down.
The hardcore world was first introduced to Haley Helmericks with her backing vocals on Open Hand’s “Tough Girl.” She would later bring her deep atmospheric voice to form the dark-wave-infused Snake Rattle Rattle Snake and much like the actual rattlesnakes of the Colorado landscape, SRRS’ music feels like it could attack if you fuck with it too much.
