BOSTON — A legendary and possibly mythical mosher was allegedly spotted last night enjoying a four-course French meal in the pit a hardcore show without…
LANGHAM, Saskatchewan — A Beta Cucks show last night at the Langham Legion Hall was interrupted when a windmilling punk was tilted by a mysterious…
OXNARD, Calif. — Local gentleman Jay Deme impressed his new girlfriend Lisa Traynor last night by politely opening up a mosh pit for her to…
HARTFORD, Conn. — An elite extraction unit was called in last night to save local hardcore kid Tom Rodrigues from a swirling mosh pit after…
LAS VEGAS — Legendary rude boy mascot Walt Jabsco, otherwise known as the logo for ska band The Specials, reportedly lost his 200th pair of…
ROCKFORD, Ill. — Chicago punk Robbie Kaplan called attendees of last weekend’s Levin-Brady wedding ‘whiny posers’ and ‘crybabies’ as he was forcibly removed for repeated…
ATLANTA — 17-year-old Fumiko Ishioka startled audience members at a hardcore show last night, standing motionless in the center of the mosh pit while wearing…
NEW YORK — Slam-dance amateur Conroy Walker somehow finished in last place in the pit at a Sick of it All show last Friday night,…
SAN DIEGO — Local hardcore kid and Terror fan Aidan Bennett purchased a new dental insurance plan yesterday in anticipation of the band’s upcoming release…
CLEVELAND — Showgoer Timothy Boyce has become trapped in a mosh pit after his panicked flailing and aggressive shouting were mistaken as genuine moshing, witnesses…
AKRON, Ohio — Legendary punk venue The Broken Bottle was evacuated late Saturday night after nobody confronted the Canada goose that landed in the pit…
CINCINNATI — Local father and metalhead Conrad Dungy has forbidden his children from opening up any mosh pits until Christmas morning, sources close to the…
KENOSHA, Wisc. — 15-year-old Mark Hall reportedly believes he has picked the perfect place to stand during an all-ages hardcore show today at VFW Post…
DENTON, Texas —A heroic pit crew set a new record last Friday night by fixing an injured, teen mosher at a crowded hardcore show in…
Merry autumnal equinox, fuckers! That’s right, it’s finally the time of year when the leather jacket you wore all summer is actually necessary and endless…
