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Everyone In Mosh Pit Suddenly Doing The Dances From “A Charlie Brown Christmas”

SANTA FE, N.M. — Attendees of last night’s set by scene legends Beyond Silent were surprised to notice that, for a solid few minutes, everyone in the mosh pit was doing the dances from “A Charlie Brown Christmas” for some reason, baffled sources confirmed.

“I was looking out into the crowd during the break down of ‘Bloody Knuckles’ and I was expecting to see people killing each other, but what I saw was so confusing. It was like they planned it, but I don’t even know how they could have,” said Beyond Silent bassist Remy Valenti. “One guy had his arms straight out in front, shuffle walking in place, another girl was taking turns resting her chin on either shoulder. I swear, there were even two identical twins doing the hands-up head-bob-side-to-side one. I kid you not. I’m still trying to figure it all out.”

Members of the audience report temporary memory loss while the phenomenon was happening.

“I can only compare it to an out of body experience. I let the feeling overtake me, and suddenly I was Linus,” said gig attendee, and self-proclaimed pitboss, Myra Fynch. “A few minutes later, I was back to shoving my way to the front of the stage, but I still had a smelly blanket in my hand. I gotta tell ya, I didn’t come to the bar that night with a blanket…It might sound silly, but that blanket was bestowed upon me from some higher power.”

Long time bouncer Harris Hayworth doesn’t claim to know how it happened, but was certainly glad it did.

“I know it’s only early fall, but when I saw those kids set aside their youthful anger in favor of inadvertently imitating a holiday cartoon from 1965, I’ll admit it got me in the Christmas spirit,” said Hayworth, fighting back a wistful tear. “Call me an old softie if you must, but after that, I craved eggnog something fierce. And even though I wasn’t part of the dancing, I definitely experienced a Peanuts-related incident later that night when I passed out on top of my neighbor’s doghouse.”

At press time, Beyond Silent was reportedly making the switch to becoming a full-on jazz trio in order to capture the same energy at their shows going forward.