Think you know everything about the classic punk subculture film “SLC PUNK!”? Think again! These mind-blowing facts will change the way you view this 100% accurate totally not bullshit take on ’80s punk in America forever!
James Merendino was inspired to write “SLC PUNK!” after seeing a mohawk in real life
In a 2015 Reddit AMA, Merendino recalled the moment that inspired him to write “SLC Punk!”
“I was at a coffee shop wondering what my deeply personal autobiographical movie should be about and all of a sudden in walked a man with the craziest hair I had ever seen in my life. He was bald, but he had this sort of red shark fin growing out the middle and sticking straight up! Naturally I asked him how much money he was saving at the barber by skipping the middle part of the head like that, and when he told me he had done it on purpose I was compelled. I thought to myself ‘I’ve just got to put that hair into my life’s story.'”
Merendino went on to explain that as he wrote about what his youth might have been like with hair like that, a sort of snowball effect took place.
“I was talking about the crazy hair man non-stop to anyone who would listen, and in return they were feeding me all this great stuff. One friend told me ‘That hair style is from a sub-culture called ‘The Punk Movement.’ Great, I’ll put it in the movie. My cousin said to me ‘Sometimes they do the hair blue or green instead of red.’ Great, I’ll put it in the movie. At some point someone said ‘Some of the punk people are women.’ I found that a little hard to believe, but hey, it’s a movie, why not?!”
In the end, Merendino credits the crazy hair man for helping him figure out what it is he wanted to say with his movie.
“I was determined to prove that the weird and crazy hair man was incorrect for having his hair all crazy like that instead of attending Harvard University, and within a few weeks I had completed my first draft of ‘Hair Idiots,’ later renamed ‘SLC PUNK!'”
Matthew Lillard never stopped breaking the 4th wall
Sometimes playing a complicated role can have a lasting and troubling effect on an immersive actor. As anyone whose seen the Scooby Doo live-action movie can tell you, there is no actor more immersive than Mathew Lillard.
Lillard recalls being warned about the dangers of portraying a character as complex and darkly nuanced as Stevo by a respected acting veteran.
“I got a call in my hotel room one morning and it was Jack Nicholson! He said ‘Matthew Lillard this is Jack Nicholson from ‘Terms of Endearment.” I know we’ve never met, but I understand you’ve been cast as Stevo, the hair idiot. Be c-a-r-e-f-u-l. That man’s hair is crazy, and it will warp your mind. I should know. I was in “Terms of Endearment’ after all.’ I thought ole’ Jack was just being cooky, but looking back, I wish I had taken him more seriously.”
Friends and family are burdened to this day as Lillard will randomly look to an imagined camera and break down whatever situation or conversation he’s involved in from the perspective of Stevo, then return to Lillard form as if nothing happened.
“Last week I was giving a speech at a friend’s wedding and all a sudden I blacked out. When I came to people told me I went on a 5-minute rant that Marriage is an archaic institution designed to reinforce the status quo set forth by our cis-white patriarchal slave-owning corporate founders and has nothing to do with love. I’m not even sure what that means.”
There were originally more tribes
The movie’s dueling factions of Punks, Mods, Neo-nazis, Rednecks, Heavy Metal Guys, and New Wavers were initially more expansive, and complicated!
As James Merendino would later explain “I wanted to weave a rich tapestry of all the players, the politics involved in a social scene comprised of many dueling factions. That’s why the tribes of Salt Lake were originally rounded out by Mimes, Orcs, The Baseball Furries, Leather Daddys, and the Burger King Kids Club, the latter of which I had hoped to sell as a product promotion but was ultimately sued over.”
The first draft had flourishes of genius — a tale of incredibly complex interplay involving espionage, intrigue, alliances, betrayals, and incest. It collapsed under its own weight and was eventually reduced to everyone beating each other up.
The failure still haunts Merendino.
“‘Game of Thrones’ would eventually get it right, but I can’t take credit for that. Well, not all the credit anyway, some of it for sure.”
The movie syncs perfectly with Berkshire’s 2023 annual shareholders meeting!
Warren Buffet says “Due process” at the exact moment Mike breaks the cop’s windshield, it’s uncanny!
Merendino assured viewers this was merely a coincidence. “We made the movie in the late ’90s, we had no access to a meeting that would happen two and half decades later. There is a chance those billionaires were big fans of the movie and did it on purpose, but I’ve tried talking with Warren Buffet and he said if I keep trying to contact him I will be ‘dealt with accordingly.'”
The Utah Mod scene is stronger than ever
If you’re not blasting Roxy Music from your Vespa scooter in Salt Lake you’re basically nobody.
Local mod enthusiast Karen Harper says it’s harder than ever to find stylish clothing at local thrift stores thanks to the popularity of the movie. “I’ve had to travel out of state to find fedoras and long jackets because the racks at the local Goodwill are always bare. Don’t even get me started on how hard it is to find a sharp looking sweater or a pair of nice boots.”
The character of Heroin Bob went through several different versions in pre-production
In an early draft of the script, the character we know as Heroin Bob was called Gorilla Sex Accident Bob, and was characterized by his hatred of sex with Gorillas. In this version, he ironically died in a gorilla sex accident.
To get into the mindset of a man who does not do heroin, actor Michael A. Goorjian abstained from doing heroin for the entire shoot
“That was the longest 6 weeks of my life and I would not do it again,” a comfortably strung-out Goorjian later admitted.
The actor was so comfortable with needles in real life he would make a show of shooting up on set. He reportedly would toss a loaded syringe in the air, catch it in one of his veins, and then depress the plunger by encouraging another actor to throw a hot baked potato at his arm from across the room.
SLC Punk! Isn’t the movie you’re thinking of
You’re actually thinking of Empire Records. Which is the better movie if everyone is being honest here.
New Jersey’s Armor For Sleep formed at the beginning of this century, signed with Equal Vision Records shortly after, and released their debut “Dream to Make Believe” in 2003. While their first record is still a favorite amongst AFS fans, your opinion is objectively/subjectively wrong if you think it’s better in any way than its follow-up “What to Do When You Are Dead.” Produced by a man literally named after a machine named Machine, AFS’ sophomore full-length is a perfect example of how post-hardcore Snooki is. Machine killed it here and on the also underrated non-EVR release, Louisville, Kentucky’s alt-rocker act Emanuel’s “Soundtrack to a Headrush”.
Despite what one may think, chaos is catchy, and Michigan’s Bear vs. Shark easily have one of the top ten band names of all time. They released a record known as “Terrorhawk” that deserves your attention, money, reverence, and inclusion in The Bronx Zoo. Sadly, it’s a tossup as to whether this one or OWEL’s is the most underrated LP here, but happily, we predict at least one more stream to both acts because of our inclusions in this piece; you’re welcome, EVR, and we will take our commission from .0004 cents via Venmo, PayPal, Zelle, or an Arby’s gift card. Anyway, the band split right after “Terrorhawk” came out and we blame you. Happily, they reunited eleven years later and you had nothing to do with such.
West Chester, Pennsylvania’s The Color Fred was launched by, you guessed it, Fred “King of All Features” Mascherino in 2003. He took a backseat to his then-new gig in Taking Back Sunday shortly thereafter and released their first full-length studio album “Bend to Break” shortly after Mr. Mascherino quit TBS. Produced by fellow Italian Lou “Is, Ie, Er, and/or T” Giordano, who also worked on Fred’s first of two TBS albums known as “Where You Want To Be” and Spice Girls’ underground masterpiece “Spiceworld,” “Bend to Break” is a must listen for tragically empty 2007 complainers in a 2023 Minnesota “aww shucks” accent world. If you disagree, get out! If not, we love to see you stay, and you should check out its sequel “A Year and Change”.
After vocalist Craig Owens was kicked out of the group, his presence was missed by fans of microphone wires, broken dreams, cute neck tattoos, and Detroit-style pizza crispy side crusters; basically, many Chiodos legionnaires feared the worst. Happily, to assuage said reservations, Brandon Bolmer, of Yesterdays Rising, replaced Owens, and helped make Chiodos’ third full-length “Illuminaudio” not only their most underrated LP in their catalog, but, hot take alert, their second best full-length album altogether. Sadly, Bolmer only lasted a few years in the frontman position, and they only created one album together, so he barely had a chance to showcase his strength to the masses. Fun opinion that doubles as a fact for Zeus: “Caves” should’ve brought the band to scene supremacy.
The Receiving End of Sirens are a band that deserves a never-ending uproarious clap, and its lead vocalist Casey Crescenzo justifies some heavy-handed finger snaps as well for his side project that ultimately became his primary one front and center called The Dear Hunter. You may or may not know too much about this band other than the fact that they have 2013 albums and counting, but the band’s fifth LP and first non-concept album “Migrant” deserves credence from the world all over for its romantic kiss of life accessibility that merges weird, symphony, melody, and catchiness better than most acts around this time. Don’t believe us? Whatever. Don’t look back, take a fifty-minute gap out of your day to let go of your sweet naivete, escape, disconnect, and spin this one from front to back. There are a number of anomalies in the present system.
We’re never, ever going to be over it, but sadly, Florida’s Never Loved is no more, but you can still check out their short catalog of one LP, one EP, and several singles while you unload the dishwasher that is on its last leg(s). If you have the choice between said options, we encourage you to listen to the band’s first and only full-length studio album “Over It.” If you want to have empirical cred data for this record, check out what we say after this semicolon; Matt Squire, producer for Panic! at the Disco, and Nick Wheeler, guitarist for The All-American Rejects, both had their hands all over this effort. While Never Loved is lost and gone astray, frontman Cameron Knopp also tours with the aforementioned Armor For Sleep and launched a new project for Equal Vision Records called White Ferrari.
Jawbreaker’s “Dear You” and OWEL’s “Dear Me” have so much more in common than the specific word “Dear,” and the particular subject of “you” or “me,” as both studio albums didn’t receive much fanfare once released, and now Jawbreaker’s effort, nearly thirty years after the fact, gets more love than ever before, so we are putting it out into the universe that we hope that we can say the same for New Jersey’s OWEL in 2045. The band’s intense in the best way live show takes each viewer and listener to places formerly uncharted in a small to medium room live setting, and more than half of the songs on “Dear Me” are five-plus minutes long, with little to no filler in each composition. Plus, its creepy, haunting, gorgeous, and black and white album cover looks like an upcoming PG-13 YA movie with mad merchandise tie-ins at Hot Topic.
Dude! Sweet! Fans of hard drugs, visible tattoos on hands and from the chest up, sweet sweet technically technically proficient instrumentals, and/or Steve “I Lost To Ralph Macchio” Vai would love the eff out of Plano, Texas’ Polyphia, who explode higher towards the solar system with each new song and release. “New Levels New Devils” is the last of three LPs for EVR, and the band definitely went out in style with this perfect effort prior to exiting the label for Rise Records. Basically, they’re nasty, bad, the BOATS, and the GOATS. If you want to hear what Mix Master Mike would sound like if he switched his two turntables and a microphone for several multi-stringed guitars, pinched harmonics, a funky in a non-corny way bass, and a drummer that lost his damn mind, check out this record and their three other LPs. YAS, rich kids are so strange.
Speaking of vurey herd drergs, we’d like to introduce you to a lil rock and roll for your heart and soul group called The Sound of Animals Fighting, just another heretic disputing the existence of a horse, the sky, Antarctica, and a bad little baby girl named Tula. Personnel here on “Lover, the Lord has Left Us…” for this slightly revolving door supergroup with masked individuals but not maggots include members of Rx Bandits, Good Old War, The Autumns, and Iron Butterfly, and TSOAF seemingly effortlessly creates music that unapologetically showcases an ample amount of curiously concerned effort. This particular record with a surprisingly high (to some) legacy is the act’s sophomore release, and they’ve only put out one more full-length on Epitaph Records and EP via Born Losers Records since, proving that small things can come in big packages.
Let’s end this underrated EVR album piece with a sad shout-out to Kyle Pavone, the late clean vocalist for Troy, Michigan’s We Came As Romans, who passed away at twenty-eight in 2018, leaving a strong sonic ghost legacy behind over the course of five brutally catchy LPs. WCAR’s third record “Tracing Back Roots” is his and the band’s finest hour on Equal Vision Records, and it’s truly difficult to find a metalcore track that encapsulates the 2010s more than “Hope”. Also, another note worth mentioning is that this effort is highly positive, making a 2023 listen more bitter than sweet. In closing, through the darkest dark and brightest bright, Pavone’s voice will never fade away. If you want a smile to counter this cry, check out WCAR’s T-$wift cover of “I Knew You Were Trouble,” which came out just one year after this LP.
It’s the Trump cameo. It’s a time bomb. It’s gonna do to your family what that homeless lady’s birds did to the Wet Bandits. Avoid.
Hughes was allegedly shocked his name was even on the credits for this one, claiming this mess of a comedy/slasher mashup bore no resemblance at all to his initial script. It’s not even available on any streaming service except Dailymotion, and if your family movie night involves Dailymotion you guys are already broken beyond repair.
No matter how dumb your family is they deserve better than 2001 CGI effects. We all deserve better.
Apparently this was an attempt to give Tommy Lee Jones his own Indiana Jones-type franchise. Not much of a surprise Hughes wound up wanting his name off of it. If someone in your family wants you all to gather around and watch a swashbuckling Tommy Lee Jones you really need to put that person under a microscope before they hurt someone.
This movie is so bad it’s frightening and confusing. The cultural divide already has your family on a razor’s edge, don’t put them through “Flubber” dude.
This one is objectively bad, but there’s always some asshole in every family that will support Chevy Chase, by all accounts a horrible person, no matter what. It’s usually a guy, he’s usually older, he’s usually dad and you’re tired of his bullshit!
It’s a live-action remake of a Disney animated classic, and while it’s nowhere near as awful as the slew of others that followed it, it opens the door to putting one of those on for a double feature that will end in at least a shoving match.
No no no WHO THE FUCK GAVE MOM THE REMOTE?!
1991 saw John Hughes write three movies dealing with class relations. It’s a subject he touched on pretty effectively in his earlier films, like “The Breakfast Club,” but his takes didn’t exactly become more nuanced once he started making “Home Alone” money. In this one, he’s saying “Just because one person is poor and another is rich doesn’t mean they can’t fall in love if they are locked in a department store and forced to fight bad guys.” It’s unlikely to make your family feel closer.
“And when are YOU having a baby, hmmmmmm?” Yeah, hard fucking pass. You don’t need to have that conversation with your parents about how it’s irresponsible to bring a child into this world because they will just end up being a soldier in the upcoming war for water.
If you’re a ’90s kid, watching a child beat the shit out of Ed O’Neill for a whole movie might sound kind of cathartic, but he’s playing hard against the “Married With Children” type here and the kid is a huge dick.
Hughes just threw a few suits some stuff from his first, radically different draft of “Home Alone” and said, “Here, make more money I guess.” If your family even thinks about throwing this one on you guys are clearly just going through the motions, and some tensions need to surface.
It’s one of the movies that instantly comes to mind when you hear the name John Hughes, but just like a whitewashed elementary school Thanksgiving pageant, it hasn’t aged well. Racial stereotypes, harassment, sexual assault, it’s a cornucopia of things for your family to argue about.
Dennis vs. Mr. Wilson isn’t exactly going to help quell the generational divide already threatening to estrange your entire family unit.
All of those straight-to-VHS sequels were absolute drivel, but the original is hands down… uhm… well not much better honestly. Charles Grodin’s curmudgeonly schtick is always amusing, but it will be undercut by your dad’s grunting approval noises at all of his complaints. Still, Beethoven remains one of our finest dog actors.
The story of a man who processes a childhood trauma through a spree of vandalism. If it were done right it might quell your family’s latent appetite for destruction another year, but it’s severely hampered by a low budget and will probably just plant seeds.
