WEBSTER, N.Y. — Leading music experts unanimously agreed that arguments between fans over which metal bands are considered to be part of which subgenres is…
Thanksgiving is almost upon us, so it’s time to engage in one of the few activities your family should be able to do without devolving…
AUSTIN – Veteran MMA commentator and comedian Joe Rogan steered his podcast conversation from his guest’s earnest discussion of mortality to talking about how strong…
I’m sick of my dork nephew and his friends pretending not to be impressed the fighting skills I’ve honed over the past three weeks doing…
LAS VEGAS — Local couple Riley Flores and Sarah Murkowski are under the false impression that their constant arguing is a fun quirk of their…
In today’s highly connected and ultra competitive world, parents want to give their children every advantage possible. As anyone who’s ever seen a Tarantino movie…
OLYMPIA, Wash. — Local straight edge 22-year-old Niki Mishtia once again proved that he is perfectly capable of acting like a moron without using alcohol…
PHOENIX — Local punk and licensed therapist Dr. Tim “Roach” Rochestky, LPCC, suggested that a patient kick his square fuckhead of a dad off his…
ROCHESTER, Minn. — Dying 80-year-old man Rex Titus revealed to friends and family today that, after a decade of battling heart disease, he is still…
LITTLE ROCK, Ark. — Aging metal fan Donny Burton went on another tirade last night about the general state of metal, recalling a “better time”…
As television becomes more fractured and confusing in the new decade, it’s important to take a step back and recategorize the different genres in a…
Theses days, the bureaucracy and red tape of local government are choking the life out of democracy. And I don’t believe I’m exaggerating when I…
Oh boy, look who just walked in. Who does this douchebag think he is? I hate when assholes from out of town come through here…
PEARL CITY, Hawaii — 15-year-old hipster Delia Park has fully transformed from an early fan to a harsh critic of her recently-divorced parents, having listened…
Many of us tend to put rock stars and touring musicians on pedestals. But the truth is, the music industry is rife with unscrupulous, unsavory,…