There’s always a lot of talk about how 1994 was the year of punk with all the mainstream success of bands like Green Day, The Offspring, Sonic Youth, and all that other lame non-hardcore shit. Real ones know 1994 was the year of hardcore. 1989 through 1993 was an awkward time for hardcore and society in general. That transition time period was when the genre moved away from the punky fastness of ‘80s hardcore and started to pull in some heavier metal influences.
We realize it’s probably been a long time since you’ve thought about a lot of these bands and you may have a hard time even remembering them in your declining years (have you taken your ginkgo biloba and Centrum Silver yet today by the way?) so we’ve compiled a list of thirty hardcore albums (and seven inches) that came out thirty years ago to help ease you into your midlife crisis. DISCLAIMER: You may feel the need to get up out of your comfortable chair and start moshing around your living room but we suggest consulting your doctor first.
Madball “Set It Off”
We’re setting things off in the most setting-it-off way possible. New York Hardcore luminaries Madball actually set things off in the late ‘80s but it wasn’t until their first major label release in ‘94 that it was officially set to the off position. This album is so New York it hops turnstiles and knocks over Times Square tourists for walking too slow. I’m too scared to critique it in any way so let’s just say 10/10 would listen again.
Unbroken “Life Love Regret”
Easily one of the most beloved albums of 1994 if not the whole decade. Unbroken went back to the lab after their first LP Ritual and emerged with just the mixture of Slayer riffs, rock rhythms, and pile-on singalongs. Sure, it’s a little rough in a “we only have time for one take for every song” kind of way but if you want musical precision maybe stick with Yngwie Malmsteen.
Strife “One Truth”
The rumor was it cost over $50k to record ‘One Truth” which was an absurd amount for a hardcore album thirty years ago and honestly is almost more absurd today. That money was put to good use though because this actually sounds like it was recorded in a real studio and not your cousin Kyle’s basement with a Mr. Microphone like most bands at the time put out.
108 “Songs of Separation”
The rise of Krishna-core in the early ‘90s is still truly kind of mind-boggling. I prefer to gloss over the hows and whys of it all and the fact that Krishna is essentially a pyramid scheme for white suburban kids to cosplay as Eastern mystics and instead focus on how much these dudes rocked the shit. Also, their homemade peanut butter cups were delicious.
Chokehold “Instilled” 7”
These angry Canadians embodied everything that made ‘90s hardcore so ‘90s hardcore: unapologetic anger, militant veganism, simplistic political worldviews, and questionable musicianship. Their 30-minute long pauses during live shows in an attempt to tune their guitars and never getting it quite right is the stuff of legends.
Merauder “Master Killer”
Meruader rode that line between hardcore and thrash crossover to perfection. It’s the soundtrack to getting a bloody nose from a roundhouse kick to the face at a CBGB matinee show because you tried to impress some girls by going into the pit (or so I heard from a buddy of mine, definitely not a thing that happened to me personally that I still lie awake at night thinking about).
Bloodlet “Shell” 7”
When I was younger I once played Bloodlet for a girlfriend and she said it sounded like a “bad Korn ripoff.” Well obviously her musical tastes were as bad as my judgment of character in dating partners. I’ve heard Bloodlet described as “evil core” which is a little cringey but I guess it’s accurate.
Swing Kids Self-Titled 7”
San Diego area supergroup of sorts that had members of Unbroken and The Locust. They successfully mixed in some free jazz elements and also covered Joy Division which were both things a lot of bands were trying to do at the time but typically with disastrous results. They get style points all around except for that wedding invitation font they used for their logo.
Sick Of It All “Scratch The Surface”
SOIA were already New York Hardcore legends by 1994 but reached a much larger audience with their first major label release “Scratch The Surface” which had a slightly less serious vibe than their previous releases and was actually a pretty fun listen. It probably didn’t hurt either that the video for “Step Down” was featured on an episode of “Beavis and Butthead” that was played ad nauseam in every college dorm room.
Mouthpiece “What Was Said”
These New Jersey edge warrior heartthrobs continued both the sound and aesthetics of their predecessors Chain Of Strength in their clean-cut hairdos and vintage varsity jackets. Mouthpiece asked the question What Remains while Strife’s question was What Will Remain? Now that it is three decades later I honestly still don’t know what it is that remains other than a blank empty void of nothingness and a receding hariline.
Downset Self-Titled
These guys were probably pretty sick of being compared to Rage Against The Machine by 1994 which might explain why they included a lyrical bitch slap about Zach de la Rocha in “Anger”. They later overdubbed the song to remove those parts of the lyrics for some reason and it sounds like an edited-for-TV movie. Remember the TV version of “Die Hard 2” when Bruce Willis says “Yippee Ki-yay MISTER FALCON”? It’s like that.
Orange 9mm Self-Titled EP
Chaka Malik’s not quite singing yet not quite rapping style fits even better with the grooviness on this record than in his previous band Burn. They re-recorded three of these songs when they got scooped up by EastWest Records in the frenzy of major labels looking for their next big alt-rock hit but unfortunately never quite found that mainstream audience. Chaka has since become an anti-vaxxer loonie bird though so maybe it’s not such a bad thing.
Outspoken “The Current”
Mike Hartsfeld’s husky vocals made it so Outspoken kind of sounds like if Henry Rollins fronted a straight edge band (Have Heart would continue this a decade later.) Their output was hit or miss on the quality but things all came together for them on what would be their final release in 1994. Hartsfeld also ran New Age Records which I always like to picture all the crystal bedazzled hippie moms who got duped by the name of that label and bought this album because the cover looked like some kind of guided Zen meditation CD.
Snapcase “Lookinglasself”
Okay so I think this actually came out in ‘93 but whatever, it’s close enough, and coming up with 30 hardcore albums from 1994 was harder than I thought it would be. Snapcase’s first full-length and (spicy old man hot take incoming) I think it’s their best. Those DOO-DEE-DEE-DEE-DI-DEE riffs just get stuck in my head. This was a huge album that everyone was listening to in nineteen-ninety thr… I mean four.
Avail “Dixie”
If you didn’t wear a backpack with that “Avail ‘Attempt To Regress’” patch on it you might as well not even bothered to go to a show in 1994. Speaking of shows, Avail at this time period had some of the best, most energetic shows that live in infamy to this day. I think every song on this album is about either living in Richmond VA or leaving Richmond VA and wishing you could go back to Richmond VA.
Coming in dead last is the dumbest cop on the force. This man is the epitome of a class traitor, happily turning down the opportunity to help his community while being the face of law enforcement incompetence in the show. ACAB.
Head of the International Association of Trailer Park Supervisors and Assistant Trailer Park Supervisors, Bernie Sanford represents the meeting point of Capital and the State Monopoly on violence via the right hook, Bernie is a man of profits above people, even raining on the legendary wrestling match between Ricky and the Green Bastard (Parts Unknown), destroying community spirit. No candy for you Bernie.
This man got educated, and instead of using his big fancy school learning to raise the living standards of everyone in the park, he bought himself a Camaro. Ca-Mar-O, serving as an attempt to elevate him above his community and family with this shallow status symbol. Just homemade fuck offs.
A nepo baby who holds open contempt for every member of her community, she even found a way to co-opt the sacred institution of polyamory into her abuse of power with her relationship with Randy and Lahey. All while still taking advantage of the lower prices of trailer living, and its perks. Piss off Barb, your scalloped potatoes are fucked.
This heavy metal dick cares not for his fellow human, holding up the park in the pilot, steering his Corvette as he sees fit, making him both a wild card and a threat to the park as a whole. That leather jacket ain’t fooling anyone you poser hack, and your trigger discipline is dangerous to all around you. Go back to the trees with Sam, you ain’t done evolving yet you dummy. Now Fuck off we got work to do.
Not only is he the face of the military-industrial complex and the only human capable of matching Jim Lahey in terms of liquor consumption, shot for shot, but also a perfect waste of a good stripper name on such a nincompoop. The shit icing on the cake comes in the form of trying to bulldoze the park with a tank, and displacing marginalized people to even worse situations is no bueno for your fellow park dwellers.
Lackey to a Lahey, Candy served as muscle for Barb in the ill-fated season 10, exercising violence on behalf of a capitalist overlord. A player hater all around who dresses punker than she actually is. Serving those in power for your own gain is most certainly not just shitty behavior, but adopting cultural dress without understanding its origins is the dictionary definition of cultural appropriation. Don’t be a henchman, stand on your laurels.
Oh you bet that cocksucker hates his fellow park residents, but not out of malice to the lower classes, just simply as a manifestation of brooding resentment buried deep in Bubbles’ subconsciousness, being what is referred to as a hater. But if we could direct his hate towards the ruling class, and turn him to our side, he could be a powerful ally. STOOPID!
Julian’s one-time cop girlfriend, Erica at least made an attempt to understand the root cause of crime by befriending the boys and attempting to find the source of their criminality. Unfortunately, she ended up arresting her then-lover and his best friend in the least erotic scenario involving handcuffs imaginable, proving that despite any posturing to the contrary, ACAB.
The first dynamic duo on this list, at first the Flappy brothers were introduced offering business opportunities to some recently released ex-convicts, by way of a brick of hash. But then they had to go and spoil it by collaborating with the most selfish characters in the show, while living off the spoils of others as drug dealers who live with their grandma, so their loyalty starts and ends at the robes.
Agents of youthful aggression and agents of the shitwinds, they rain glass hellfire on any and everyone in their vicinity, causing a communal shitstorm for all, so at least they have a good comprehension of direct action. Let’s bet $20 to say that they could harness that youthful energy towards more constructive causes if they start reading books like Julian.
The compassionate mother to Trinity, and on again off again flame to Ricky and almost everyone in the park, she knows the value of community involvement. But let’s not forget that she would have happily sold out everyone in the park for George Green. Do no banging behind the muffler shop.
Corey and Trevor are the type of guys who will sell out to the highest bidder, but generally have a decent sense of morality while being not much more intelligent than a house cat or dog, so you really can’t blame them for following their master. Ironic since both Corey Bowles and Michael Jackson (Canadian Actor) both quit the show over a pay dispute. Regardless, smokes, let’s go.
The once store clerk turned park resident and replacement Trevor, Jacob has more brain cells than Corey and Trevor put together, rendering him able for whatever endeavor comes his way. And he later bornts Ricky’s grandson via his cock, caring for the next generation with or without financial compensation. Not bad for a former meat dick.
When he’s not brushing his big ole cave teeth with a log, he’s soliciting political support with homemade hot dogs or stitching up gunshot wounds of criminals for some extra cash, guaranteeing that they won’t be arrested. A soldier of cave fortune if you ever knew one, he’s no ally, but if you’re in a pinch, return to monkey with this cave troll.
Scooby is in the “private sector” probably because he failed a drug test as a police dog. But with that past, he’s pretty chill and just trying to catch the big fish and smoke a doob afterward. Great Danes just aren’t the aggressive type. Plus, he’s got a partner who totally just wants to log the hours and clock out.
The only crime with Willis is not movin’ and groovin’. The only cop who might detain you for not holding and packing. You might get cuffed, but only if you ask, baby. The only crime against the Village People is using their songs without permission at your rally. That will result in litigation.
Wiggum’s biggest fault is he’s just lazy which is about as innocuous as a cop can get. He’s probably not going to pull you over, or inconvenience you in an any way, because an inconvenience to you is an inconvenience to him. He’s like Chris Christie if his dad wasn’t on Wall Street.
Community policing, cares about the neighborhood, grew up here and never left other than his backing of Regan’s second term and the things he said about [Regan’s] Policy this crime dog’s got a pretty decent track record as far as cops go. Other than time in 1991 he got confused (in dog years he was 87) and took a bite out of a perceived crime, that was not in fact a crime but a small child, and was subsequently sued, thereby ending his career in the public eye
ACAB does not include the NAVY or goth scientists that either defined your style or your sexuality, or both. It’s agreed upon. Although she’s one of the good guys, as a known caffeine addict, Abby may get too jazzed up and muddle some forensics to secure a successful prosecution, but only when she really needs to.
Rick is the cop of the future. It’s 2019 in “Blade Runner,” so surely we’ve advanced to the point of police officers fully upholding the Constitution right? Right? Your rights are probably safe with Rick Deckard, unless of course, you are a humanoid slave, then, do you really have rights? Just hope you don’t look like an android. Maybe slouch more? Try to look normal, but not too normal
Definitely a theme of dog cops being on the chiller side. These guys are led by children but are mostly just there to save lives. There’s no political undertone involved when you’re saving other non-sentient animals from trees. But watch out, catch these boys after a bath and they’ll get the zoomies all over your ass and they ain’t stopping till someone puts a finger in their ass (that’s how you stop dogs from fighting. Did you know that? Look it up).
Although his methods are uncouth and some of his jokes are culturally insensitive, Detective James Carter always tries to solve the mystery. But he was on the Epstein Plane, like a lot. No one’s talking about this. Why was Carter on the plane so much? Was he undercover? Was Jackie there? Is this “Rush Hour 4”? I don’t know about you, but it seems like a hard sell.
His whole thing operating untethered by law, and he’s got the gadgets to bug your whole house. And depending on the era, he’s gonna violate a lot more than your civil rights. A cop with a serious drinking problem and a license to murder with total immunity makes you really wonder how this story takes place in England and not Florida. But hey, you get Phoebe Waller-Bridge to smooth him out and he’s pretty fun to watch.
This guy has resting stop resisting face. Kevin would pull a gun on you for not waving back at him. This jumpy coward would pull a gun on you for you taking literally anything out of your pocket. If you’re wearing a hoodie after 5 p.m. you’re getting a gun pulled on you. If this guy can’t see your hands at all times, gun.
You may not remember this but Harry Potter ends up becoming an auror, a wizard cop. Typical high school hero shit. He’s proven himself to be aggressively stupid and have a temper, which fits the bill. So watch out if you get the blue lights on this broomstick. He’s basically Tim McGraw from the movie version of “Friday Night Lights” to his kid he gave 7 dumbass names to, riding his broomstick around drunk, pulling people over in mid-air telling them about the time he survived the Unforgivable Curse, daring people to do the curse on him, then arresting them when they won’t do it.
The show is in black and white, so that’s all you really need to know. But more than that 1930s-era cop in rural North Carolina, he’s not even going to know what a civil right is. “Miranda Rights? Miranda? Never heard of the broad, but if she knows what’s what she’ll shake a leg back to her boondoggle” is something he’d probably say as he shoved you into a squad car for chewing bubble gum too loudly.
D.W. from the beloved ’90s kid show Arthur, eventually grew up to become a cop. D.W.’s got a little sibling complex and a very active imagination. Alarmingly, her imaginary friend never went away. She’s still imagining her. She’s also imagining you ran that stop sign, and she’s imagining you consented to a search, and she’s imagining you reached for a gun. Let’s just say anyone who isn’t an aardvark should steer clear. She’s taking out some sort of aardvark guilt on the community
Jim sicks his special ops buddy to beat the shit out of you without a trial, collect clues, and secure a conviction. You think he’s gonna give you his badge number? That guy will listen to an entire town’s phone calls, he’s like if the patriot act were privatized and could beat the shit out of you afterward (wait). Jim Gordon is Dick Cheney?
Plants coke for the greater good, this guy’s stock to a turn for the worst in the 2010s and public opinion really soured on him once people realized one “marijuana cigarette” doesn’t contain “as much tar as 100 packs of cigarettes” and that most drugs are fun, and not freely offered like a Altoids. D.A.R.E. Lion is highly likely to “find” drugs in your pocket during a “routine” stop and frisk. D.A.R.E. Lion should’ve been kicked off that cliff in Africa and trampled by wildebeests. RIP Mufasa.
