LOWELL, Mass. — Local addict Sam Agnew asked his coke hookup to keep his tab open after the drug dealer upgraded to a cashless system…
OKLAHOMA CITY — Employees at a local accounting firm are reportedly confounded by a recent hire who is simultaneously the worst co-worker they’ve ever had…
Christmas is supposedly the most wonderful time of the year. Yet it’s the most difficult to navigate without a little Christmas “tree” if you catch…
PORTLAND, Maine — Frugal punk, and self-described “hopeless romantic,” Tyler Castaneda recently devised a scheme to save money by dating the woman who sells him…
BIRMINGHAM, Ala. — Southern woman and recreational drug user Darlene Abbot reportedly refers to every amphetamine or stimulant simply as “coke,” citing cultural norms and…
Are you someone who struggles to make connections with others? Do you continuously fail to initiate meaningful conversations, you boring, boring fuck? Are you looking…
FORT COLLINS, Colo. — Health-conscious punk Stacey “Skaggs” Bellamy will no longer drive her rusted-out cargo van to purchase illicit substances, but will instead bike…