Doing an escape room together can be a rich bonding experience for your whole family. We say “can be” because it won’t be, because you’re you guys.
Following these tips from the experts may help you solve all of the puzzles before time runs out, but the ultimate prize of a functioning loving family will still elude you. Anyway, let’s solve some puzzles!
1. Don’t Crowd The Room
Typically an escape room will allow for more players than is really helpful. You don’t want too many cooks in the kitchen stepping all over each other. Uncle Bill is in town? Okay. Whatever other alcoholic he’s currently dating? They can sit this one out.
2. Communicate Everything
It is crucial that everyone on your team is on the same page at all times. You found a potential combo? Say it. You solved a lock? Tell everybody. You’ve always felt stifled by your mother’s fear of letting you spread your wings and you resent her? Well, no, you’re not going to say that. You’re just going to sit on that and let it fester and rot forever.
3. Listen
Sure you’re incapable of doing this with your children when it matters most, like when they try getting you to see them for who they are not who you want them to be, but you can do it in a puzzle room for an hour, right? Right?
4. Follow The Rules, It Saves Time!
Not only is ignoring the house rules potentially dangerous, it can be a huge waste of time. That door labeled “staff only” isn’t a red herring, so don’t try to open it! You’re kid saying “Stop asking me if I’m on drugs!” might actually have clinical depression, so stop trying to find their stash instead of getting them help!
5. Explore
You never know where something could be hiding, so look around! Maybe there’s a clue hiding under that jewelry box. Maybe that candelabra is a secret switch. Maybe that hug from your father is hiding under that rug.
6. Don’t “Attack The Lock”
Many escape rooms use basic combo locks that you could learn to pick on Youtube, but don’t. Not only is it cheating, but it can disrupt the natural flow of the game. It might feel like a victory in the moment, but it can make things harder and more confusing in the long run. It’s like when Dad bought everyone ice cream instead of apologizing for punching that hole in the wall.
7. If You Use Something Once, You’re Done With It
Typically in an escape room, once you’ve used something you won’t use it again, so it’s helpful to make a “discard” pile to avoid wasting time. Keys and combos are like the trust between parent and child. Once you’ve exploited it, it’s done forever.
8. Process Of Elimination
If you’ve found the first 3 numbers to a 4 digit lock but you just can’t find the 4th, don’t waste time looking! Just cycle through all 10 possibilities for the last number. And if you’ve tried every conceivable way of forcing your son to be interested in football, maybe just accept that they aren’t you!
9. Avoid The “We Need To Get On The Leader Board” Mentality
An escape room is all about the experience. The most rewarding escapes are usually the ones that take the full hour. You’re here to have fun, not set records. Save that high-expectation pressure for shaming your daughter when she only gets into her backup school.
10. Divide And Conquer
Most escape rooms are non-linear, with multiple puzzles that can be solved at the same time. Instead of everyone crowding around one lock, branch off and see what you can accomplish. It’s a great strategy for escape, and a great way to internalize “I am so much more without these people.”
11. Stuck On A Puzzle? Give Someone Else A Chance
We all have blind spots, so if you think you know how to solve a puzzle but you’re just not getting anywhere, try giving another member of your group a turn. Hey, that worked! Now, will you help your wife get the free time she needs to land that real estate license instead of trying and failing to open that bar forever? No? Hmm.
12. Stay Calm
Anxiety won’t help you solve puzzles. It’s 15 minutes in and you haven’t solved anything? Stay calm. You’re 30 minutes in and you’re still in the first room? Stay calm. The thin veneer of a functional family is crumbling around you while a stranger watches on camera and judges you? Stay calm.
13. Stay Organized
Keep used locks in one place and try to keep items that seem to be related close together. You don’t want this escape room turning into another illustration of your collective depression and turmoil, like the kitchen.
14. Don’t Use Excessive Force
Your family really ought to know by now that this solves nothing.
First of all: Check out DREAMCAR, an epically 1980s in the not-so-thrilling 2010s alternative/new wave supergroup containing bassist Tony Kanal, drummer Adrian Young, and guitarist Tom Dumont all from No Doubt, and prolific AFI/Blaqk Audio vocalist Davey “Oh!” Havok. Now that you’re done listening to all of DREAMCAR’s lone and self-titled 2017 album, thank us kindly, don’t do nothing, and revisit or listen for the first time to 2012’s “Push and Shove,” No Doubt’s reunion/most recent record, which came out nearly eleven years after 2001’s “Rock Steady.” It’s honestly a good LP, but truly is not that great because of its various sonic inconsistencies, and sadly is the band’s last record for the foreseeable future, and no more summers. Still, the album debuted at number three on the Billboard 200, proving that people still clamor for non-solo Stefani, and that is not to be undone.
Imagine Fishbone listened to a lot of Faith No More, Madness, and early RHCP, and you have this frenetic-in-a-fun-way record essentially boxed in; get it? Regardless, it has to be said that No Doubt’s 1992 debut self-titled studio album was originally recorded in a true DIY fashion, and redone after ND signed with IR. Unfortunately for the band, the label dropped the ball on this one, blaming such on flannel sweaters, and No Doubt literally had to self-finance a music video for our “play it again” song below known as “Trapped In A Box;” damn the man, save the empire. In tried and true form with the suits who know nothing about music except for the fact that it exists, this album initially tanked, eventually forced the band to self-produce their next, and low and behold, just one album later took ND to Mars and back.
If the seven-second mark of “Hella Good,” track two on 2001’s “Rock Steady,” was repeated for the entire album every seven seconds moving forward, this LP would’ve been ranked third or second, but underneath it all, it wasn’t, starting zero proverbial fires. While the band’s underrated previous album “Return of Saturn” was a letdown sales-wise, this one is slightly more of a disappointment from a song standpoint, but not from a moving unit one, impressively selling nearly three million copies in the United States during the age of Kazaa. We attribute this album’s success to a combination of catchiness, trends shifting, and overall scheduling, as it took them far less time to make this one than the one before it. Also, No Doubt knew that their audience wanted to dance, and dance they truly did with Bounty Killer, Lady Saw, and Mike Damone for nearly fifty minutes.
By the way, sometimes going back to your roots is a really good thing, and No “Freaking” Doubt reopened the gate of their then-fledgling career with 1995’s raw in a good way sophomore studio album “The Beacon Street Collection,” which is an undeniably fun, fun, fun ride for all of its ten tracks… And it came out the same exact year as “Tragic Kingdom”! Holy moly. That’s a lot of doubt for no. Also, Gwen Stefani sounds YOUNG AF on this and No Doubt’s debut self-titled album because she was, and still is, you creeps. The album cover may be silly, but so are you. Sublime fanboys, girls, people, and individuals who dig “Pawnshop” unite: The late Bradley Nowell of Sublime is featured on track three, “Total Hate ‘95,” which is about Pauly Shore’s “Jury Duty,” which is a cinema member of the EGOT club.
No Doubt’s fourth album has no “skip it” tracks, and neither does the next Shakespearean sovereign state LP below. Don’t let it go away, do not pass go, and do in fact watch the 1999 movie film “Go” featuring a then-new eventual track from this record called, uh, “New,” and Ramona Quimby of Judy Blume’s classic laserdisc “James and the Giant Peach.” We also think that this album would’ve sold way more records if it came out two or three years prior, but that’s showbiz, folks! Gwen’s braces that came out one year prior actually did better at the box office than this long-playing record… Hey yo!
Hey you! Happy now? Don’t speak. You can do it! Anyway, we’re gonna stop now with this likely predictable to everyone reading this ranking slot, but sometimes what is expected is best, except to all of who love this one but will still soullessly and criminally defecate on it, claiming that The Orange County Supertones, the biggest band in the Satanic scene, are so much better at the ska and music thing than ND. Whatever helps you sleep at night. This album is responsible for many incredible songs that are still played regularly on rock and pop radio, and a bunch of Bindis to basics. In closing, we’re gonna end it on this: If you had a chance to catch No Doubt on this album’s triumphant 1997 tour with different people known as The Lunachicks and “Pinkerton” era Weezer, you lived the good life without an old man cane.
He’s too old to be doing this. A white-haired pastry chef starting a DIY venue is a recipe for Chef Wendell to get his ass kicked whenever some tough guy band wants extra drink tickets. He’s best suited creating cereal magic in the kitchen. Leave this pure old man alone from that devil’s music.
Mr. Mini Wheats wants people to eat him and his friends. Not sure if they have a death wish or a vore fetish but either way this isn’t a guy you want hanging around teenage musicians, or anyone for that matter.
There’s little imagination needed to figure this one out. One loves to steal and the other is a cop. Neither one is trustworthy. It’s also not a good sign that the two people running the venue are always fighting.
This guy is clearly unstable and cannot be trusted with any responsibility. Booking shows at his place would be a nightmare, he openly admits to being mentally unstable to anyone who will listen. Any door money collected for bands will disappear the minute he’s got his mind on cereal.
This spineless loser gets walked over by kids all the time. His place is gonna be filled with kids looking for a place where they can drink beer without being carded and all the dudes who have been banned from other venues just hanging around playing with their knives. By the end of the venue’s run, it has slowly been turned into a meth lab and he’s just gonna go “Oh well, fun while it lasted.”
Will charge people $20 at the door if he thinks they’re dumb enough then will pocket the cash and drive off before any of the bands on the show realize they still haven’t been paid. He will also pee on the cars in the parking lot.
The venue would feature a half-baked wall mural of Bob Marley made out of Sharpie markers and they would constantly talk about how they want to “Open up a skate shop out back” when they really need to invest in a plumber because the toilet is overflowing again.
Snap, Crackle, and Pop started their venue entirely because no one else wanted to host their terrible band they describe as “Catch-22 meets Thursday meets Nick Cave.” They’ll insert themselves into most shows they host despite getting old faster than the soggy cereal they promote.
Nothing special about his place. Everyone who attends barely cares about the bands and talks over them. Much like the cereal being changed from Sugar Crisps to Golden Crisps, the venue’s name had to be changed due to association with certain illegal activities that occurred.
Lucky is all about magic or as he would say, “Magick.” The name of the venue will be an unpronounceable sigil he created. After the shows die down he will try to get the remaining people to participate in a sex ritual but most people still there at 5 a.m. don’t want to hook up with this guy who has Andy Rooney eyebrows drawing circles on the floor.
By the end of the day Buzz is just another drone serving his hive and Queen. He will forever be a bootlicker who is ready to give up his punk lifestyle whenever it becomes too time-consuming. Plus the floors in the place are way more sticky than any human can comprehend.
Every single flier, and I mean every single flier will have “Follow my nose” listed as the location. This will be great at confusing police from shutting the place down. His sketchiness is questionable due to his refusal to accurately spell the word fruit. Makes you wonder if that’s a legal thing he’s hiding.
This Sgt. Pepper looking guy loves to host psyche rock acts which is cool, but all the food options in the venue cut your mouth up so bad that most bands vocalists can’t even perform. Also, if you accidentally knock his hat off he will beat you within an inch of your life.
Carmella is known to throw crazy events. She is a DJ so she hosts a lot of raves, but the venue is in that sketchy part of town where all the streetlights are broken and even the trains seem to drive faster.
Frosted Flakes are barely healthy or extraordinary in flavor but that never stopped Tony from promoting them as this delicious meal for doing sports. That means it doesn’t matter if the band sucks, Tony will talk up how Grrrreat! they are. Definitely good if your band is playing. Still, he’s kind of a jock and all the toilets were replaced with a giant litter box.
STP’s second self-titled album is their second worst self-titled album, and their weakest altogether; we don’t make the rules. This LP starts our piece with sad news and is the first full-length record from the band without their late singer Scott Weiland, who also moonlit as the vocalist for Them Crooked Vultures. The X-Factor’s Jeff Gutt is an amazing “new” frontman, and this is NOT a joke. However, he had HUGE shoes to fill from both Weiland AND the late vocalist from Linkin Park, Chester Bennington, who sang for the band’s lone 2013 EP “High Rise”. Mr. Gutt can sing better than most, but he even knows that Weiland’s voice is paramount for STP. Gutt seems to take this in stride, and videos of him performing STP’s sonic catalog live do the songs almost as much justice as the original lineup’s finest hours.
Released just before the world shut down from the globally renowned/critically acclaimed cholera epidemic of 2020, Stone Temple Pilots’ eighth and newest studio album “Perdida” is definitely Jeff Gutt’s best one at the band’s helm, and that may sound like a freaking put on, but it truly isn’t a push off; he’s our prince and you’re our jesters. Released via the home of the best band of all time, The Rutles, Rhino Entertainment Company, “Perdida” is a solid ten-track LP from start to finish, and FAR from a loss… See what we did there? Hardcore STP fans and others just discovering the band need to check out the Japanese edition of this record as well, as it has three live acoustic renditions of three Weiland hits “Big Empty,” “Interstate Love Song,” and “Daughter.” In closing, Jeremy spoke in class today, and we fare(d) he well through the years.
Stone Temple Pilots’ first self-titled LP, which was their sixth album as a band, and last full-length to feature frontman Scott Weiland on lead vocals/megaphone, came out almost exactly nine years after their fifth album “Shangri-La Dee Da,” and proved to the world that there was still a surprising-to-some demand for the band, as the record debuted at number two on the Billboard 200… Not too shabby, stewards!! The band dared its fans to take a load off, care, and they did, as fast as they possibly could. Also, just after releasing a greatest hits album called “You’re Welcome,” STP told the world that they were done as a band in 2003, but got back together five years later, like all bands who break up except for the ones that don’t. Sadly, Weiland was fired in 2013, and even more tragically, he passed away in 2015.
We’re going to die on a hill right now: “Days Of The Week” is without question or hesitation one of Stone Temple Pilots’ best singles. We’re going to live on a mountain right now: “Shangri-La Dee Da” is without question or hesitation the band’s worst album name. It’s quite cliche to take influence from The Beatles, but some cliches are cliches because they are positive! This record is the band’s first of four to be released this century, and is by far their best from the aughts and beyond; the ‘90s were just better in every way for STP and everyone else on this planet. Also, both of the DeLeo brothers and drummer Eric Kretz absolutely shine like Collective Soul on this full-length!
“No. 4,” the band’s worst record of the ‘90s, is still much better than your best work ever… Even Sarah “Harvard Man” Michelle “Wife Of Former WWE Employee, Freddie Prinze Jr.” Gellar “Prinze” agrees, and Buffy is always right! If you had a chance to catch Stone Temple Pilots with Red Hot Chili Peppers and Fishbone for this album’s tour, and stayed the whole time, you definitely saw Angelo Moore and Anthony Kiedis. If not, you were likely watching Incubus open for 311 as “Drive” was about to infect your local grocery store, which is a trademark for Mom Rock. Anyway, despite the fact that “No. 4” contains a song called “Sex & Violence,” of which said derivative title appears on more albums than the word “the,” sour girls and sweet boys from all sides of the spectrum should and did appreciate this hard rocking and musically strident effort by STP.
Moving forward there are no “skip it” tracks in this piece but it must be stated and notarized: “Big Bang Baby” is without question the band’s best single on all of their albums, and possibly their best song/music video. If you disagree, and we know that you freaking morons will, we will send seven caged tigers to your domicile and/or your mother’s garage. That would be, wait for it, wait for it, a literal tumble in the rough! “Tiny Music… Songs from the Vatican Gift Shop” might be one of the weirder album titles of the ‘90s, of which there were many, but its incredible songs counter said weirdness with, uh, weirdness in a good way! Critics, except us, are very stupid, and this album got a lot of unnecessary hate from “music” “journalists”. Whatever and ever amen, man. Press play, and get lost in this psychedelic fur.
Sorry this isn’t No.1, but it also isn’t literally No.4. Anyway, Stone Temple Pilots’ debut 1992 album “Core” completely and utterly rocked the world, and that is NOT an understatement, as said LP was certified EIGHT times platinum in America. Eight. Times. Platinum. That stat is unheard of these days in the age of the stream and short attention span. Still, haters like you will always have their say/way/spray, and STP managed to be labeled in an inferior publication as both the Best and Worst New Band. Make up your minds, weirdos! Although track three, “Wicked Garden,” is slightly better and that’s a non-opinion based fact, according to Wikipedia, the gospel of truth and Ruth, track nine, “Plush,” was the fourth most-played song of the ‘90s decade on mainstream rock radio. Try doing THAT, Candlebox!
These colors don’t run, and “Purple” wins this competition by a short margin… Mazel tov to Grimace/your great aunt’s mu’umu’u! “P” for “Purple” is “P” for “Perfect,” which makes sense given the fact that it came out in 1994, the best year outside of the 1960s for popular culture in the form of music, film, art, and television. “Purple” is a diverse/powerful listen, and proves that a sophomore doesn’t have to slump. Fun fact: Weezer’s “Blue Album” is not named such, but it is also based on a color, and it too came out in 1994. Fun addendum to said fact: The word “Purple” is not to be found on its album’s cover, but if you bought a new copy of the CD in the ‘90s, it was on a sticker. Yeah, we’re a stickler for accuracy.