COLUMBIA, S.C. — Former Vice President Joe Biden’s campaign is reeling today after the Democratic contender reportedly kissed a baby square on the lips while…
WASHINGTON — Scientists at the Gibson Institute of Environmental Studies issued a stunning new report yesterday, claiming the devastating effects of climate change could mean…
SALT LAKE CITY — Members of supposed straight edge band Untainted were cast out of their local scene yesterday after debuting a logo that did…
DOVER, N.H. — Democratic National Committee Chairman Tom Perez was seen painting a fake tunnel onto the side of a mountain yesterday, admittedly hoping to…
DELTONA, Fla. — Local punk Lester Paige was mocked for hours by friends and colleagues last night after bringing home a new mattress purchased from…
CONCORD, N.H. — The undeniable sexual chemistry emanating off of local folk duo The Barncat Brigade was communicated through stomps on an empty suitcase in…
SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Founding members of rock outfits Best Coast and Red Hot Chili Peppers are protesting a contentious new law that caps the amount…
According to one source within the organization, these appear to be the matches the Beyond Wrestling General Manager is planning for “Beyond Championship Wrestling” at…
Medal of Honor Awarded to McDonald’s Employee Who Put Chicken Nugget in Trump’s Order of Large Fries
Medal of Honor Awarded to McDonald’s Employee Who Put Chicken Nugget in Trump’s Order of Large Fries
WASHINGTON — President Trump awarded the Medal of Honor, the nation’s most prestigious personal military decoration, to the “hero” who slipped a chicken nugget into…
DETROIT — A neglected Hoover WindTunnel vacuum currently stuffed in the front closet of notorious punk house The Slayboy Mansion is desperately yearning for the…
It’s hard to believe that the “Fashioncore” era of hardcore is nearly two decades old. This was a time that saw many people dying their…
REVERE, Mass. — Misguided 43-year-old street punk Martin “Peanut” Landers announced today that he will be upping his cigarette intake to help himself lose 15…
ST. PAUL, Minn. — Local woman Connie Walters is fed up with all of her friends constantly asking for financial advice, based solely on the…
LOS ANGELES — Local girlfriend Ashley Wagner mistakenly believes Bryce Latterby, her boyfriend of six months, is actively engaged in a sultry conversation with Instagram…
CUPERTINO, Calif. — Apple released a surprising new report today, revealing that the average iPhone owner uses roughly half of their storage space to save…