10 Worst Pieces of Advice Millennials Were Taught Growing Up
Hey, Boomer. Think you’re so smart, eh? Well, here are the worst pieces of life advice ever passed down to…
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James Knapp — Page 16
314 stories found
Drunk Friend Somehow Makes It Past Three Separate Locked Doors To Vomit On Stack of Freshly Laundered Clothes
MORGANTOWN, W.V. — Self-proclaimed party animal Derek Plomchock astounded friends and roommates by somehow surpassing three sturdily locked doors and…
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Fun Uncle Regrets Every Life Choice He’s Ever Made
TOLEDO, Ohio — Nieces and nephews of local fun uncle Dennis “The Dennster” Drindle were shocked recently to learn that…
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Band Agrees to Practice Song Drummer Wrote but Say It Counts as Both His Birthday and Christmas Present
ELLENSBURG, Wash. — Members of local skiffle-punk revival band Rat Boy and The Cheese Police agreed to practice a song…
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10 Celebrities You Didn’t Know Have Secret Twins
Celebrities — until now, a harmless nuisance. But sometimes, they have secrets. Deep, dark, occasionally identical secrets that we here…
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Here’s How I Turned My Passion Into A Career By Selling Nylon-covered Mannequin Legs Out Of A Dirty Tent Next To The Highway
When someone is committed to following their dreams no amount of psychiatric intervention can stop them. Which is why today…
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5 Beginner Punk Songs You Still Aren’t Good Enough To Play on Guitar Even Though You Bought That Ibanez Like Fifteen Years Ago
Look, learning guitar is hard. That’s just how it is. We know it’s not fair and you’ve been trying to…
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Is It Intrusive Thoughts or Is My Taint Actually Way Too Long?
Before I run back upstairs to get the tape measure again I want to be absolutely sure about this. If…
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“I’m a Spooky Boy” Mutters Matt Skiba Repeatedly While Staring At Self In a Cracked Mirror
LOS ANGELES — Notorious punk rock ghoul Matt Skiba was spotted monotonously saying the phrase “I’m a spooky boy” over…
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Skateboarding Defines Me as a Person in That I’m Not Good at It and Don’t Know Why I Keep Trying
I am a skater. Skating is who I am. While the rest of you were off learning how to read…
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