Look, some things are just set in stone. 2 + 2 = 4. “I” before “E” except after “C.” Flu shots cause irreversible testicular torsion…
BERLIN — A group of punks and aspiring assassins traveled eighty years back in time only to fail in their attempt to kill Adolph Hitler…
We are in an era of unprecedented musical creativity. From trap-metal to sad boi country, genres have been mixed and mashed to the point where…
Okay so this is all still a bit strange, and frankly we’re still very hungover, but let us give you a little bit of background…
AUSTIN, Texas — Local 20-somethings Ashton Knoll and Kevin Stohl were approved yesterday for a second mortgage on their fiddle leaf fig tree, which the…
TACOMA, Wash. — Local 33-year-old Darrell Ornsby realized yesterday that “the universe is a lie and life is a joke” as he transferred a load…
LINCOLN, Neb. — Scene members held a candlelight vigil last night for Gary Johnson, the still-alive merch guy for punk band The Orphan Molesters who…
TAMPA, Fla. — Ronnie “The Neck” Garefino, the virtuoso guitarist for the speed metal band Fisting Frankenstein, is admittedly “totally clueless” when it comes to…
DENVER — Newly single man Chris Fangerburg held a moment of silence for his former relationship today, lowering the toilet seat in his recently rented…
LOS ANGELES — A study from the TV ratings conglomerate Nielsen found that Americans spend an average of 12% of their income on streaming services…
CUMBERLAND, Md. — Residents of local punk house the Couch Arsenal rotated the only ashtray on the premises yesterday to allow guests easier access, wheezy…
LEMOYNE, Penn. — Roommate and all-around jackass Glen Sullivan reportedly drank the last beer in the house moments after having sex with your girlfriend of…
KNOXVILLE, Tenn. — Regal Cinemas CFO David Ownby asked his friend and HBO Max subscriber Richard Lansing yesterday to please share his HBO Max password…
The Covid-19 pandemic has drastically altered how we celebrate special occasions with our loved ones and now that’s it’s impacted me personally, I’m no longer…
SEATTLE — Singer Ryan Kemper’s commitment to a sober lifestyle brought an alarming realization yesterday: his band of more than a decade, Voodoo Bukowski, is…