Many of the immigrants that come to the United States seeking a better life are woefully overqualified for the low-skilled jobs they’re forced to settle…
Friends are arguably just as, if not more, important than family. A bond thicker than blood. They’re there for us during the best and worst…
Erica, oh my God, no! Erica? ERICA??! Nonononono please come back to me. This can’t be real. My beautiful Erica, snatched from me in the…
An alarming and depressing new study found that Baby Boomers are still, for the most part, very much alive and selfishly they have no intention…
CLEVELAND — Lonely divorcée Gary Funk was caressed last night for the first time in years by venue security at Wednesday night’s Stone Temple Pilots…
BUFFALO, N.Y. — Tigerpanther frontman Nicky Pittman drastically misjudged his audiences’ level of familiarity last night with several of his songs, reportedly leaving attendees confused…
NASHVILLE, Tenn. — Guitar effects pedal manufacturer Strymon announced today the release of a new, $1000 reverb pedal called the BigNothing, which models its cavernous…
BOISE, Idaho — Touring band Star Monkey traded one of their roadies last night to fellow touring band Tree Destroyer, exchanging him for a new…
SPRINGVILLE, Ind. — Authorities patrolling the annual Gathering of the Juggalos decided to make no attempts last night to reunite a lost four-year-old child with…
EL SOBRANTE, Calif. — Primus guitarist Larry “Ler” LaLonde quietly admitted today that he’d like to get one of his original songs onto one of…
We’ve all been there before- you’re checking out the trendy new bar in town and you really hit it off with the hot bartender. Signals…
BANGOR, Maine — A punk show scheduled for 7 p.m. last night at Lobster Prison is currently 10 hours past the expected start time, while…
Thanks for coming into my office today. Investing your time, energy, and emotions into a potential relationship partner is quite an undertaking. Effectively and efficiently…
PEARL CITY, Hawaii — 15-year-old hipster Delia Park has fully transformed from an early fan to a harsh critic of her recently-divorced parents, having listened…
LAWRENCE, Kan. — Elderly punk “lifer” Alicia Rosenblatt came to the difficult conclusion yesterday that her decades of punk spirit and ethos were indeed a…