ARLINGTON, Va. — Local man Mark Sadler believed a meme he saw today was exactly the kind of thing his ex-girlfriend may potentially enjoy, texting…
BIRMINGHAM, Ala. — Local man Dan Traver warned friends this morning that his roommate Will Fu’s tweeting of various Elliott Smith lyrics will likely “…turn…
NEW YORK — Struggling indie trio Sternum First adopted a French bulldog puppy yesterday, undergoing one final attempt to reconnect and save the band from…
DENVER — Local punk Zane Winslow Jr. claimed today that although he is named after his father and is familiar with his father’s existence, he…
WARRINGTON, Pa. — Local man Bryan Walsh is terrified and “jumping to insane conclusions” this morning after his father, commercial electrician Murray Walsh, cryptically said…
DULUTH, Minn. — A new report released today in the New England Journal of Medicine claims that the feeling of being in love with someone…
High school is a minefield. It’s the first time young people feel the pressure to distinguish themselves as worthwhile individuals. That’s why it’s always so…
PEORIA, Ill. — Local guitarist Matt Carlton asked his Sweetwater sales rep today to be in his wedding as his best man in a truly…
BOSTON — Local woman Anne Deloach is certain the first track from her ex-boyfriend’s latest EP is about her, despite his forgetting her almost immediately…
SYRACUSE, N.Y. — Local hardcore kid Pete Sheehan was overcome with emotions at a show yesterday after running into his ex-hoodie of two months, sources…
So, you’re driving your crew to the movies and you put on that new song. The one you’ve been listening to all week. The one…
BROOKLYN, N.Y. — Displaying remarkable skill and reflexes, Brett Echelson livestreamed a complete speedrun of a calzone from his neighborhood pizzeria last night, setting a…
GREEN BAY, Wis. — Aging punk Brian Kowalczyk marked himself “safe” on Facebook early this morning upon learning that iconic American hardcore outfit 7Seconds has…
BUFFALO, N.Y. — A ray of off-seasonal sunshine last week showed local goth Mark “Markness the Darkness” Patel that his shirt was actually a deep…