OTTAWA, Ontario — Beloved ‘90s singer-songwriter Alanis Morissette updated her classic song “Ironic” to highlight the absurdity that the only attractive member of Limp Bizkit,…
NASHVILLE — Notorious guitar collector Joe Bonamassa is being praised for saving a mint 1965 Gibson ES-335 from a lifetime of quality songwriting in a…
BURLINGTON, Vt. — Local extremely confused man Kirk Unger struggled to determine if he was hearing a live recording of The Grateful Dead or just…
LOS ANGELES — Alleged pedophile and formerly popular rapper Drake hopes a friend can get him hired at Trader Joe’s until the fallout of his…
CHARLESTON, S.C. — A new study by the College of Charleston confirms that the majority of shoppers at JoAnn Fabrics espouse stronger and more tangible…
The miracle of childbirth changes you instantly. When I first saw my goopy baby and heard its cries, my heart swelled; I knew life would…
IOWA CITY, Iowa — The members of local prog metal band Miscreations are embroiled in debate as to whether their name is “Miscreations” or “The…
MANCHESTER — New wave obsessive and romantic introvert Jana Chapman is disappointed to find herself in a love triangle that no one could possibly consider…
I am way too good of a friend. Despite being a total bebop jazz head, I agreed to go to the Sonic Breeze EDM Festival…
Just about everyone is getting sober these days. Self-destructive musicians, degenerate friends, and even Aunt Linda are laying off the booze as of late. These…