FORT WAYNE, Ind. — Hartfield Insurance sales representative Ernie Boisvert told his coworkers today that he is “…a bit of a musician himself,” apathetic sources…
LOS ANGELES — Legendary emo quartet Rockem Sockem Gobots announced today a 10th anniversary tour celebrating their record Stunted Descension, playing the album in its…
It was November 11th, 2016. Socially-minded people like me were crying on sidewalks outside of Trader Joe’s locations all across the country. Did this mean…
SKULL MOUNTAIN — The dreaded dragon Pwaun, bringer of fire and pain, was awoken from slumber yesterday upon his hoarded collection of medium-sized band T-shirts…
HARTFORD, Conn. — An elite extraction unit was called in last night to save local hardcore kid Tom Rodrigues from a swirling mosh pit after…
CHARLOTTE, N.C. — Local zine Weedkiller published their annual list this morning of the hunkiest, most eligible bachelors of Charlotte’s extremely niche stoner sludge scene,…
STILLWATER, Okla. — Doorjam guitarist and licensed driver Cory Adams passionately disagreed yesterday with his bandmates on what the phrase “treat it like a rental”…
EL PASO, Texas — Local musician Lenny Windsor was sentenced to two consecutive life sentences today for his part in a wild game of “Fuck,…
Dear Scabby: How do I tell my long distance boyfriend that I still live with my parents? -HOMEBOUND HOTTIE Dear Homebound Hottie: My parents once…
Even though it ended in 2013 The Office is more popular than ever thanks to its enduring, relatable characters. The original American version obviously, not…
FAYETTEVILLE, Ark. — The singer and one guitarist of punk octet TetrisTetris surprised the other six members of their band yesterday that a new record,…
STAUNTON, Va. — Members of local band Schrödinger’s Wëasel are reportedly questioning bassist Wade Carr’s supposed graphic design experience, which appears limited to creating stick…
The buzz about microdosing has been percolating into mainstream awareness for some time now. We’ve heard rumors about high powered CEO’s and Silicon Valley Wunderkinds…
WASHINGTON — President Trump reversed this morning an Obama-era policy limiting the amount of guitar solos butt rock bands could include in a single song,…
PARAMUS, N.J. – Publishing company Marion-Waxslaw released the revised 3rd edition of its Pop-Punk Rhyming Dictionary earlier this week, expanded to encompass nearly eight full…