ANN ARBOR, Mich. — A study published Thursday in the University of Michigan’s Journal of Human Psychology confirmed that an old lady librarian going, “SHHHHHHHHHHH!”…
TRAVIS COUNTY, Texas — Local college student Jason Manzano expertly danced around the subject of vaccination rollout last week upon returning home on break from…
LOS ANGELES — Local band Effigy at the Madhouse Tabernacle were spotted manning their merch table outside one of Dodger Stadium’s mass vaccination entrances this…
ERIE, Pa. — Self-proclaimed grindcore aficionado Eduard Riva has vanished from the internet in recent months, as Facebook’s content flagging protocols continue to catch and…
WASHINGTON — Jerkhole bassist Alex Miller finally overcame his anxiety yesterday to ask why his bass guitar includes two extra strings, amused bandmates confirmed. “I’ve…
ASHEVILLE, N.C. — Local punk Adam Schultz is beginning to regret using one of his three wishes to bring infamous singer GG Allin back to…
Traditions can eat a dick. They’re always accompanied by violent cultural baggage or a devastating family memory involving my Aunt. However, a few years back,…
The world is changing and the local music scene is no different. People are bringing politics into everything, every band has opinions they’re cramming down…
It’s no secret that all music today is utter trash. Me and my friends say so all the time. As a true music lover, I…
PARMA, Ohio — Local punk Matt Onofrio looks substantially worse after getting in better physical shape over the last several months, defying all laws of…
WASHINGTON —The American Association of Retired Persons announced yesterday that their bi-monthly magazine will now come with a copy of the once-popular “Punk-O-Rama” music compilation…
TEMPE, Ariz. — Punk band Precedent Smashers celebrated the release of their new album “Bash the Cheeto” yesterday, which they believe will be the final…
DENVER — Local beagle Danzig used what may be the first words uttered by a canine last week, allegedly to offer to fetch his owner…
CHICAGO — Local punk Gary “Crutch” Burke’s girlfriend Jacquelyn Flowers, who helped Burke get off of drugs, stop living on the street, and is paying…
OAKLAND, Calif. — The local Oakland hardcore scene announced today that it will collectively convert to being a heavily tattooed running group after months of…