LOS ANGELES — Veteran musician and Alkaline Trio founder Matt Skiba reportedly wishes he hadn’t gotten a prominent tattoo of his former band when he…
SEATTLE — A coalition of ‘90s doctors announced this morning that fully vaccinated individuals are safe to peruse each other’s overstuffed CD binders in a…
BOTHELL, Wash. — Audio equipment giant Behringer excited consumers by releasing a new line of electric drum sets that comes pre-covered in dust, allergy-ridden sources…
LOS ANGELES — A recent study conducted by music researchers at UCLA concluded that Blink-182’s “Greatest Hits” album from 2005 isn’t in need of any…
LOS ANGELES — Aging punk Mike Cruz was ordered by the Council of Punk Legitimacy to inform his neighbors that he is a registered poser…
ALLENTOWN, Pa. — Aging former Warped Tour musician Brent Storm sold his van and is now working for a local PetCo as a freelance pet…
Move over, Geraldo Rivera! We uncovered the All-American Rejects’ dirty little secret. That’s right. We finally got to the bottom of the inspiration behind the…
NORTH HALEDON, N.J. — Local failure Max Kugler was reportedly sighted practicing his ollies at the Haledon Skate Park on Saturday night in a last-ditch…
HARTFORD, Conn. — Local punk and 31-year-old adult man Kenny Whalen remains blissfully unaware that he is the Whalen family’s cautionary tale, concerned sources confirmed.…
ATLANTA — Bass players across the country are the only adults over the age of 16 who are not currently eligible for vaccinations, with the…
SANDUSKY, Ohio — The Pop Punk Diocese of Ohio is facing a wave of criticism following the transfer of a frontman who faced multiple accusations…
LONG BEACH, Calif. — Metalcore band Her Empty Lungs have yet to replicate the success of their Lady Gaga “Poker Face” cover included on a…
ATLANTA — The CDC issued new guidance this week aimed at expanding COVID-19 vaccine access to individuals currently experiencing any age-related struggles chronicled by The…
The world is changing and the local music scene is no different. People are bringing politics into everything, every band has opinions they’re cramming down…
BALTIMORE — Local parents Mark and Susan Finkleburg skillfully avoided an emotional conversation with their child Mark Jr. last week by sneakily replacing his beloved…