DISTANT PLANET — At this week’s mass funeral of some 614 Pikmin, Captain Olimar of the Hocotate Freight Corporation came to the saddening realization that…
LOS ANGELES — It has come to light that USC’s Overwatch team is made up entirely of the children of celebrities following the bombshell revelation…
It’s been a week now that I’ve been stranded here on planet QV9978 and I’m up to my eyeballs in bullshit. Supplies are running low,…
TOKYO — During a seven minute long press conference this morning, Game Freak, the makers of the popular Pokémon series of games, offered the first look…
EAST PALO ALTO, Calif. — While on a lunch date at Three Brothers Tacos, local nerd John Davis took a conversational detour to explain that…
I have liked my son ever since he came out 18 years ago, and I’ve been competitive on the parent ladder for all of those…
SAN MATEO, Calif. — Mobile technology programmers laid out plans yesterday to incorporate a feature into every app that would enable users to swipe left…
Red Dead Development, a new Ken Burns documentary detailing the grueling work conditions at Rockstar during the development process of Red Dead Redemption 2. Watch an…
PLANO, Texas — Pizza Hut president Artie Starrs announced this morning via a conference call with shareholders that the restaurant chain will release a new,…
SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Local 12-year-old Tanner Allen gave his father Grant a ride to Ace of Spades last night to see ska-punk legends The Aquabats…
SAN FRANCISCO — The “death” section of the Wikipedia page for punk legend Benny Core is far longer than any other category documenting the musician’s…
OSince the birth of ska in 1997, fans all around the suburbs have been taken with the upbeat hooks and backbeat guitar of the southern…
IRVINE, Calif. — On Wednesday, video game developer Uncommon Systems announced a new battle royale game Battle Royale: Battle Royale which allows players to play…
ALLSTON, Mass. — Local musician Doug Robinson attempted to borrow a bassoon last night for his set with folk-punk octet Rat Solidarity, assuming one of…
NEW YORK — In a press conference today, American Civil Liberties Union president Susan N. Herman announced that the organization will “reconsider and reexamine” its…