True crime has been one of the biggest forces in pop culture for years now and shows no sign of slowing. People are fascinated by…
HENDERSON, Nev. — A local punk found dead under an overpass with no phone or ID was quickly identified by friends after they recognized her…
KALAMAZOO, Mich. — Local stoner Dave Truman set out to prove to friends, family, and acquaintances that weed is not addictive by abstaining from the…
Drat! For once in my gadbum life, I was being responsible. I finally did the adult thing and paid a farking paunchload of cash to…
CHICAGO — Local punk Jacob Brown found his net worth has skyrocketed now that drink tickets are redeemable again at reopened venues across the city,…
NEW YORK — Compassionate Queens native Kacey Mora selflessly volunteered her time to help bathe actor and infrequent washer Jake Gyllenhaal, sources close to the…
When my Uber driver arrived at my home without the drink that I ordered to go with my meal, the drink I PAID for and…
SCRANTON, Penn. — Toby Louvern, lead vocalist in doom-pop band Expired Sex, was stricken with the deepest existential terror of his life during a recent…
CHICAGO — Local nonagenarian Horace Miles finally settled on a design for what he would like his first tattoo to be after mulling it over…
WASHINGTON — The American Psychiatric Association at its annual conference announced it added “poser” to the latest update of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of…
LAFAYETTE, La. — Exalted indie musicians Justin Vernon, popularly known as Bon Iver, and Sufjan Stevens reportedly had an unexpected, hushed spat backstage at a…
Congrats to the Southport High School graduating class of 2005! Remember how you all wrote “Never change!” in the yearbook of class punk, Jimmy “Upper…
CHICAGO — Perpetually lonely heterosexual man Cliff Parker is living under the mistaken assumption that he would be getting a lot more action if he…
AUSTIN, Texas — Local horny-as-hell woman Wendy Charleton fears what might happen if she were to get drunk alone with close friend Collin Montrose due…
Yes, before you ask, these are bed bug bites all over my body, and no, I do not need the number of a great exterminator…