WASHINGTON — The heavily anticipated Million Frontman March, meant to promote brotherhood and unity while taking a stand against backstabbing, entered its 17th consecutive day…
NEW YORK — The American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals released a new commercial this week, set to the Leftöver Crack song…
DALLAS — Former Shit Scrotum frontwoman-turned-real estate agent Nell Marsh is confident the unfinished basement featured in her latest property listing will be a major…
ANAHEIM, Calif. — Local punk Philip Allers took advantage of this week’s Black Friday chaos, completing all of his holiday shoplifting at a nearby Target…
KINGS PARK, N.Y. — Local punk Joe Ricchio finally bonded with his fanatical sports fan father last week, thanks to the multiple self-inflicted head injuries…
Did you know that most poor neighborhoods have a lead amount of 15 ppb? I don’t know what that means but we need to make…
WESTLAKE VILLAGE, Calif. — Local guitarist Rochelle Yearwood received an “amazing” coupon this morning, giving her 15% off any product at Guitar Center as long…
ALLSTON, Mass. — David “Big D” McWane, lead singer of Big D and the Kids Table, was asked to dine with the adults today at…
TACOMA, Wash. — Newlyweds Jane and Dalton Davis opted not to travel home for Thanksgiving, choosing instead to host a “Friendsgiving” and incidentally ensuring they’d…
SAN FRANCISCO — Local woman Jade Smullen is spearheading a campaign to honor the victims of cultural appropriation this Thanksgiving, giving out free sage sticks…
CHARLOTTESVILLE, Va. — Local guitarist Joel Svensson admitted yesterday that he bought the recently released JHS OrcGrinder pedal primarily based on its cool name and…
RICHMOND, Ind. — Depressed man Mike Calkins’s cries for help yesterday were laughed off again by friends and colleagues, due to his frequent use of…