CHARLESTON, W.Va. — Local man and lead singer of popular metal band, A Fistful of Fetuses, thought it a good idea to consult his company’s…
Somebody call the Brothers Grimm! A modern-day retelling of their famous German fairy tale, Rapunzel, took place at the Wake County Fair, as a burly…
BOULDER, Colo. — Local man and obvious liar, Benjamin Walters, who was recently diagnosed with COVID, claims to have caught at “the gnarliest show” he’d…
When it comes to America’s teachers, I think we can all agree the label is more than deserved. One such hero is the tireless Mark…
SAN FRANCISCO — Customers at local coffee shop, Verdant Cafe, collectively felt shivers go through their spines when a barista announced a “cow’s milk” latte…
Who’s ready for the best weekend of the year? This guy, right here! And apparently, nobody else because, once again, I booked the main hall…
OAKLAND, Calif. — The cautionary tale of long-time road dog and punk scene veteran “Wild” Bill Ketchum is reportedly being taken as encouragement by struggling…
HILLSBOROUGH, N.J. — Local party-goer and person seemingly in need of some “quiet time,” Katherine Gallagher, is being asked by those around her to “take…
ENUMCLAW, Wash. — Local lovey-dovey punk Geoff Bayweather took his partner by complete surprise after serving her a traditional breakfast in mattress on the floor,…
Ever since the birth of the Misfits, women have been unable to resist the unquenchable sex appeal of a delicious devilock. A sharp and salacious…
COLUMBUS – Self-proclaimed anti-capitalist, James McCarthy, expressed his true feelings for his long-term partner by forgetting it’s Valentine’s Day for the fourth year in a…
Are you fucking kidding me?!?! That call was bullshit! Well that’s just fucking great. My team’s season is done, I’m in a terrible mood, and…
LAKEWOOD, Ohio — One-time Lakewood High School football legend Jaime Garner made the long and treacherous journey back to his hometown mere days after graduating…
You know, it’s not every day you get invited to an orgy. Especially when you’re approached by a stranger while shopping for bottles of Bud…
SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Local man Will Chalke shared his health-conscious drinking regime this morning, noting that – in order to keep himself in check –…