MONTREAL — Manufacturers of online AI-driven mastering software LANDR announced a new feature today that politely declines a band’s inevitable invitation to the release party…
NEW YORK — Spotify project manager Diego Valenzuela received an unprecedented raise of $0.00437 today for single-handedly rebuilding the streaming platform’s advertisement system from the…
RICHMOND, Va. — Researchers and social archaeologists at Virginia Commonwealth University discovered last week that the first-ever house show scheduled still has yet to begin,…
SAN FRANCISCO — Local Guitar Center sales associate Dan Shin deemed a customer’s routine purchase “pretty sick” earlier this week, sources close to the enthusiastic…
Acclaimed ogre and Hollywood superstar Shrek is best known for the proliferation of nude photos containing his likeness on the internet and his publicly turbulent…
BOSTON — Local woman Anne Deloach is certain the first track from her ex-boyfriend’s latest EP is about her, despite his forgetting her almost immediately…
ASHEVILLE, N.C. — Legendary singer/songwriter Bob Dylan incorrectly introduced several of his own songs at a concert yesterday as “covers,” despite having written them himself…
TEMPE, Ariz. — Local punk Arnie Parker vowed to take the crown for the worst tattoos back from modern hip-hop music with a marathon home…
BOISE, Idaho — Local man John Larsen abruptly left his post at Pet Supplies Plus yesterday to race home and check out an album a…
GAINESVILLE, Fla. — Irritated neighbors of yours confirm you fully lost your shit early this morning when you discovered the indie-rock band Los Combustibles while…
NEW YORK — Dating website OkCupid announced on Wednesday that they added a new filter, enabling users to search for potential partners with a Black…
NEW YORK CITY — Rolling Stone magazine announced today it would be scaling back the latest version of its popular special feature, merely ranking the…
DUXBURY, Mass. — Members of suburban punk band Trash Pirates shocked the underground music world by openly thanking their parents’ money in the liner notes…
PORTLAND, Maine. — Music fan Trevor Eastman’s Pandora account is still reeling from the painful, ear-wrenching effects of giving a thumbs-up to a Simple Plan…
IOWA CITY, Iowa — Music critic Tess Haroldson published an expertly-written negative review today of the latest album from local ska band Fishnet Envy, despite…