GLENDALE, Ariz. — The highly anticipated Rihanna Super Bowl Halftime show is expected to include an In Memoriam segment to honor all the Eagles fans…
BATTLE MOUNTAIN, Nev. – Officials at the Battle Mountain PD announced that they successfully signed Spencer Hall, a local schoolyard bully, and complete menace, to…
LOS GATOS, Calif. – Netflix is reportedly set to announce new cost-cutting measures to replace executives in charge of developing content with old TV Guides…
BURBANK, Calif. – Disney announced that the highly-anticipated third season of their hit series “The Mandalorian” will focus on Yoda as a teenager and his…
AUBURN, N.Y. – Local dad Walter Morris reportedly interrupted his family’s annual viewing of “It’s a Wonderful Life” to inform them that Hunter Biden’s laptop…
The lamestream media will try to convince you that the War on Christmas is a bunch of made-up right-wing propaganda meant to stoke political division…
LA MESA, Calif. – A group of 38-year-olds attending last night’s Social Narcolepsy gig reportedly spent the entire show discussing the best route home, confirmed…
I guess it’s asking too much to have a nice quiet meal with my family at this restaurant without being hit on every second. Why…
I’d like to start off this hearing by stating for the record that this is an absolute witch hunt. The faculty members and parents who’ve…
LAS VEGAS – Actor Mark Wahlberg recently asserted that the fictional events contained in Bobby “Boris” Pickett’s 1962 novelty song “Monster Mash” never would have…
MINNEAPOLIS — Frustrated local teen Amber Bronte complained to anyone who’ll listen, that the cursed amulet she unknowingly purchased at a haunted thrift store doesn’t…
DALLAS – Local man Shane Whitlock recently blew the two-drink minimum at a small, laid-back music venue clear out of the fucking water, according to…
DETROIT – Local band Affirmation Rising revealed that their traditional pre-show huddle mainly consists of prayers that serious allegations about them don’t come out, confirmed…
Before I started practicing meditation, the stresses of the world got to me. The global pandemic, crippling inflation, and of course the repercussions of my…
LONDON – Prince Andrew, Duke of York, is reportedly pestering the entire staff of Buckingham Palace to ask if his mother’s royal funeral will be…