HINSDALE, Ill. — Twitter user Shannon Nichols updated her profile bio today, moving “Trump Supporter” ahead of her other chosen…
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CORUSCANT — The reigning Galactic Empire is selling old laser cannons, starfighters, and other weapons and vehicles to small-town police…
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JERICHO, N.Y. — Recent college graduate and virtual intern at JPMorgan Chase Danny Galiardi has no idea what to do…
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ASHEBORO, N.C. — Local punk Dean Brown set his morals and political ideologies aside again yesterday in order to shop…
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DETROIT — Aging rocker Perry Dunn, frontman for the seminal hair metal band Töpsy Türvy, left his rented room at…
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PHILADELPHIA — Local punk Dominique Martin was pleased to discover today that her total credit score was nine, believing this…
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JASPER, Ark. — Local militia member Lance Hagan accidentally ate the three years' worth of emergency rations while anxiously watching…
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So, here you are. Sitting in a dive bar in some town in Wisconsin. You just ordered your second round…
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LOS ANGELES — Actor Ryan Renolds was reportedly worried about his mental health when he came across a photo of…
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CHICAGO — A poll of citizens leaving a nondescript brick building today gave no new information on which to gauge…
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