EGG HARBOR, N.J. — Spirit Halloween announced today that they will keep their stores closed until October, when they will…
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PITTSFORD, Vt. — 28-year-old Alex Solorzano is now in his seventh week of blaming social distancing for his sexual inactivity,…
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Freelancer
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MINNEAPOLIS — Rioters protesting the unlawful killing of another unarmed black man at the hands of police officers successfully burned…
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Louie Aronowitz
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DUBLIN, Ga. — Members of the official Facebook group for all things related to Dublin, Ga., have finally stopped hiding…
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NEW YORK — NYC Police Commissioner Dermot Shea confirmed today that police shooting targets all come standard with their backs…
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Doug Francisco
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MUNCIE, Ind. — Sgt. William Porter, an active member of the Ku Klux Klan, was killed last night following a…
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DENVER — Lifelong sports fan Brian Pimento is allegedly now “all in” for German soccer club Borussia Mönchengladbach despite never…
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John Merrifield
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NEW YORK — Local two-timer Thomas McGibbons is looking forward to the end of quarantine after being stuck with his…
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Rick Homuth
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SAN DIEGO — Local classical guitar virtuoso and all-around good dude Sheldon Michelson’s musical talent and congenial manner is consistently…
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LOS ANGELES — Game show contestant Karen Graham used her “phone-a-friend” lifeline to call local police on the $500 question…
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