Billy Patterson
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July 23, 2020
WASHINGTON — FBI Agent Raymond Kesler is desperately hoping to avoid assignment to the Bureau’s newly formed TikTok surveillance unit,…
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John Danek
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July 23, 2020
LOS ANGELES — B.C. Rich, a company famous for making electric guitars popular in the heavy metal music scene, will…
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Patrick Coyne
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July 22, 2020
PHILADELPHIA — An anonymous protestor sporting a distinctive mohawk, dozens of gold chains, and American flag Zubaz pants was spotted…
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DEDHAM, Mass. — Local Star Market employee Jimmy West will no longer be applauded for his brave commitment to serving…
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Louie Aronowitz
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July 22, 2020
ABINGDON, Oxfordshire, U.K. — Experimental rock band Radiohead revealed today that their seminal album “Kid A” actually stands for “Kid…
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Mark Bouchard
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July 21, 2020
Spongebob Squarepants.The bubble-blowing, fun-loving, flamboyant sea sponge has been entertaining young children and stoned adults for over 20 years. But…
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FLAVORTOWN, Calif. — A quality-of-life ordinance passed by Flavortown’s town council this week will guarantee residents monthly universal chili con…
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Tom Peters
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July 21, 2020
WINSTON-SALEM, N.C. — Disgruntled, maskless consumer Rod Shockley was seen outside a local supermarket yesterday asking customers complying with the…
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Jordan Breeding
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July 20, 2020
WASHINGTON — A broken and sobbing Eric Trump choked down a seventh consecutive can of Goya beans this morning after…
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Bibek Gurung
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July 20, 2020
NASHVILLE, Tenn. — The embattled country group formerly known as Lady Antebellum, and more recently Lady A, has finally settled…
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