TORONTO — Recent divorcé Simon Brandt, who hasn’t been to a live performance since before his marriage, purchased tickets today to see indie-rock act The…
VERO BEACH, Fla. — Groom-to-be Anthony Minor realized last week that he has no idea what his close friend’s real first name is, second-hand-embarrassed sources…
MARION, Iowa — Local woman Richelle Sumner has undertaken the responsibility of helping her friends learn more about themselves through her tarot card readings, despite…
CHERRY HILL, N.J. — Graphic designer Mike Mingus is facing a crisis of conscience today, after a chance encounter between his previously uncontacted tribe of…
HOUSTON — Local man Carlos Berry is suspected of going from ironic enjoyment of the “Flat Earth or Death” Facebook group to a very genuine…
CHICAGO — Polite and respectful punk Jimmy Arano “did the right thing” at a house party last weekend by slightly moving a small pile of…
PHILADELPHIA — The biggest fan of local indie rock band Cash Only is reportedly Kevin Estrada, a close friend who doesn’t have an ounce of…
BELLINGHAM, Wash. — 25-year-old Kyle Booth suspects that his new punk friends only like him for his basement, now that he’s befriended a local hardcore…
AUSTIN, Texas — All-around nice guy Ken Ludlow has reportedly found himself in another long-term relationship with a woman despite his wanting to “just be…
PLYMOUTH, Mass. — Local parent Marsha Douglas still isn’t sure exactly what foods family friend and vegan Carolyn Hansen will eat, sources confirmed earlier today.…
THE INTERNET — A Facebook friend of yours, whom you vaguely recall from high school, couldn’t be more excited to share an exciting, not-at-all predatory…
HOUSTON — Local crust punk Shiloh Waters is still feverishly searching for a potential sitter for his beloved bedbugs while he is away on tour,…
TAMPA, Fla. — Local man Garrett Doyle has somehow managed to build a real-life personality even more insufferable than the one he portrays online, according…
HUNTSVILLE, Ala. — An attempt to locate a passport was halted earlier this afternoon when Capricorn/Libra-rising Vickie Bailey-Wilson paused the search to calculate her natal…
ST. LOUIS — Your self-described friend and all-around buzz kill Stevie Fuchas graciously informed you that the young woman who engaged in unprompted flirtation with you…