Culture Archives - Page 384

Chuck Kowalski • July 29, 2020

This is an American crisis of epic proportions. People, I need help and fast! A force of heavily armed, camo-laden…

Piotr Parker • July 29, 2020

TAMPA, Fla. — Local police officer Stan Barton has entered his sixth consecutive hour at Royal Ink Tattoo Studio, brainstorming…

Cory Cousins • July 28, 2020

SUGAR LAND, Texas — New homeowner and devoted metalhead Eric Bronson replaced the out-of-date shag carpet in his living room…

James Knapp • July 28, 2020

MINNEAPOLIS — Local jokester Jeff Kessler’s impersonation of acclaimed actor Chistopher Walken last night was met with stunned silence, as…

Ted Pillow • July 27, 2020

Being a socialist means I believe in income equality, universal healthcare, and affordable housing, but it sure as fuck doesn’t…

Kevin Tit • July 27, 2020

TUCSON, Ariz. — Local cop and racist bully Dennis Peters, who once brought a gun to Roosevelt High School in…

Patrick Coyne • July 27, 2020

SANTE FE, N.M. — A coworker you loathed with every fiber of your being strutted around your funeral yesterday telling…

Jimmy Adamson • July 26, 2020

CHICAGO — Local woman Lilly Choi’s depression has devolved to the point that she has stopped looking behind the shower…

Doug Francisco • July 26, 2020

ELMHURST, N.Y. — New York City Sheriff's deputy Deandra Washington ceremoniously took a knee with the tenants of a local…

Alexandra Houle • July 25, 2020

LOS ANGELES — Australian commuter Daniel O’Connor spent $17 out of desperation yesterday during a layover at LAX for the…

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