Growing up I thought high school was gonna be full of parties and whacky hijinks where my three best friends and I would chase girls…
FORT WAYNE, Ind. — Local father Bill Matheson has offered his children, family, friends, and modest acquaintances the opportunity to rip any of his 1,300…
Throughout Latin America thousands of murders each year are directly linked to the cocaine trade. Beyond the egregious toll on human life, the global cocaine…
KENOSHA, Wisc. — 15-year-old Mark Hall reportedly believes he has picked the perfect place to stand during an all-ages hardcore show today at VFW Post…
ITHACA, N.Y. — High school student Peter Church etched a swastika into his 9th period math class desk in a bizarre attempt at “reclaiming” the…
Shocking revelation alert! Talking Dead guest, Melissa McBride, who plays The Walking Dead’s badass survive-at-any-costs mother figure “Carol,” reportedly stopped watching the show two seasons…
MINEOLA, Texas — The hope of trying West Coast-based fast food restaurant In-N-Out Burger is reportedly the only thing keeping noise-pop band GIFTHORSE from ending…
SHAMROCK, Texas — The owner of the local punk bar/venue Calico’s will donate two drink tickets to each person affected or displaced by the wildfires…
BOSTON — Stanley Remington, the older brother of local punk James “Meatball” Remington, is “doing fantastic,” according to a report issued by the mother of…
SEATTLE — The War on Christmas took a disturbing turn this week when radicalized Starbucks employees released a shocking video showing the beheading of one…
TACOMA, Wash. — Local musician and Craigslist browser Rachael Linwood found a posting on Wednesday seeking members for what appears to be the worst fucking…
NIAGARA FALLS, N.Y. — Three days after his 34th birthday, computer programer Adam White admitted his growing concern that he’s now “too old to die…
In the past two years, Stranger Things has taken the world by storm, largely due to its high nostalgia value, heart wrenching story, and phenomenal…
OMAHA, Neb. — Fundamentalist punk Jacob Krayer believes the Greater Omaha hardcore scene is only six years old despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary, sources…
It Doesn’t Count as Mansplaining if I’m Totally Wrong
Look, I’m not an expert on, well anything. I’m just a curious guy who likes a lively debate. Will I take the position of devil’s…