SEATTLE — Recently relocated musician Nadine Oliver is still finding her way hating the city chosen last month as her new home, according to neighbors…
Aries (March 21 – April 19) Keep your cool this week, Aries. Temper tantrums are like rocks in rochambeau — you should only throw them…
Wealth distribution across the world is highly unequal and the fact that only eight people hold on to 50% of the world’s money is shocking.…
NEW HAVEN, Conn. — Gravel took home the honors last night for the most damaging and uncomfortable surface to drunkenly face-plant onto after a long…
NEW YORK — Bartender Chad Gallo reached out to ex-girlfriend Ashley Thomas last Monday with a text reading “U up?” at around 3 p.m., multiple…
Aries (March 21 – April 19) Not a great week for confrontation, Aries. Yes, you’ll definitely regret dropping $150 on doner kebabs for a bunch…
TAMPA, Fla. — Independent researcher Spencer Griffith uncovered a “bombshell” yesterday in the continuing Stormy Daniels-Donald Trump story, discovering over 80 Stormy Daniels sex tapes…
DERRY, Maine — Local punk Liberty Van Zandt is running out of blank skin for commemorating her dead pets, and is expected to be fully…
MINNEAPOLIS — A 1986 Ford Econoline van baffled onlookers and scientists alike last night after somehow inhabiting two separate parking spaces at precisely the same…
CHICAGO — The Copper Creek Bar music venue announced plans this morning to instill and enforce a strict 12-strike policy against assault, following their latest…
SEATTLE — Local dog and apparent vegan Noodles reportedly remains unaware of the dietary restrictions forced upon her by her well-meaning owner, confused sources report.…
I’ve been doomed upon this fate for many of years. Sure, I may look powerful with my crystal ball and steed, but I assure you…
Aries (March 21-April 19) Aries is known as the most adventurous of all the zodiac. While your bravery and risky behavior is applauded by some,…
HILO, Hawaii — A recent string of attacks on tourists attending DIY punk shows in various parts of Hawaii has been linked to a brutal…
The moment is over. Poof! Done. Gone. Bang! Actually, scratch that last one. Either way, you just missed your chance to talk about gun control.…