Liam O'Malley
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WASHINGTON — Making full use of his last full day in office, President Donald Trump announced a posthumous pardon of…
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Ish Gupta
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WASHINGTON — Capitol Police instructed potential rioters today to “just use the same route as last time” in response to…
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Chris Jones
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WASHINGTON — President-elect Joe Biden and his administration offered pizza today to any citizens willing to help move some boxes…
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Jake Menez
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WASHINGTON — President Donald J. Trump has peacefully vacated the White House after following a trail of Diet Coke bottles…
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Tony Morse
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Noted dildo opponent and serial killer cosplay enthusiast, Ted Cruz, is a serious man known for his steely resolve and…
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Malcolm Whitfield
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LOS ANGELES — Actor and filmmaker Adam Sandler was forced to dispose of the screenplay for his new film “Hank…
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GEORGETOWN, Del. — Local man Ben Hartsock resumed his normal business of yelling at skateboarders for trespassing in a parking…
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WASHINGTON — DC-based tour guide Christopher Hollis is currently attempting to quell an insurrection at the Capitol Building in order…
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Zac Townsend
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This has to be some type of miscommunication. ICE just showed up at our front door. We allowed them in,…
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Zoe Grobman
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WASHINGTON — Following a string of other legal concessions in the waning days of his term, President Donald Trump announced…
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