DENVER — Local pornography enthusiast Brett Wallace was caught off guard moments ago by an advertisement for Democratic presidential candidate Mike Bloomberg while watching a…
Mark my words. If Donald Trump loses the 2020 presidential election I am moving to the only other place that comes to mind when I…
Medal of Honor Awarded to McDonald’s Employee Who Put Chicken Nugget in Trump’s Order of Large Fries
Medal of Honor Awarded to McDonald’s Employee Who Put Chicken Nugget in Trump’s Order of Large Fries
WASHINGTON — President Trump awarded the Medal of Honor, the nation’s most prestigious personal military decoration, to the “hero” who slipped a chicken nugget into…
I don’t understand what happened to this country. Since when did celebrating the greatest British musical import since The Beatles become a crime? How does…
These liberals get upset over every little thing, even sucking dick. Everyone knows that sex shouldn’t be a safe space. I am a proud, red…
PITTSBURGH — Political punk band Anti-Flag surprised fans with a brand new album titled “In Oil We Trust” inspired by Iran’s bombing of Iraqi military…
WASHINGTON — Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi and President Donald Trump began the impeachment process this week by standing in place, slowly charging up…
OAKLAND, Calif. — A loose nail on the stage at a campaign stop earlier this week led to the revelation that Presidential candidate Bernie Sanders…
WASHINGTON — Famed cursed twitter account @dril became a conservative icon this morning after being retweeted by President Donald Trump, in what experts say may…
IRVINE,Calif. — Local punk Jenny Stoever is hoping against all hope that her father Ted Stoever’s ardent support of President Trump is just a passing…
EL PASO, Texas — Former Congressman and presidential hopeful Beto O’Rourke paid a visit this week for a CBS News feature to his old hometown…
Well, this is just a fucking mess. Last night I went on what my ex refers to as one of my “dangerous binge drinking sessions”…
WASHINGTON — President Trump threw a life-like dummy of himself moments ago off a bridge onto sharp rocks below to seemingly avoid being impeached for…
WASHINGTON — Steve Bannon was flabbergasted to learn yesterday that his hate-filled, racist propaganda and rhetoric, once considered the cornerstone of the alt-right scene, is…
PALM BEACH, Fla. — President Donald Trump reportedly spent Wednesday morning roaming Mar-a-Lago Resort pining for the days when America consistently put out work that,…