Is there anything better than an ice-cold beer? I don’t know about you, but at the end of a hard day, or when the impending…
EL PASO, Texas — Former United States representative Beto O’Rourke announced a new skateboarding video game that lets players collect the letters to spell out…
We recently sat down with renowned intellectual Noam Chomsky for an illuminating discussion on political systems, linguistics, and the state of the world. Unfortunately, the…
With the Verhoevian monster truck rally that is the Republican National Convention finally upon us, we here at The Hard Times decided that the only…
WASHINGTON — Vice President Mike Pence is looking forward to debating Kamala Harris’ husband, Douglas Emhoff, on key issues impacting American heads-of-household and their wives…
NEW YORK CITY — Notorious anti-video game Senator Bob Sandleson was found this weekend blowing a video game cartridge inside a bathroom stall in JFK…
FLAVORTOWN, Calif. — A quality-of-life ordinance passed by Flavortown’s town council this week will guarantee residents monthly universal chili con carne payments beginning as soon…
SEATTLE — A visibly nervous group of Democratic leaders held a closed door meeting today to discuss possible ways to ask mega-corporation Amazon to chip…
WASHINGTON — President Trump ironically announced earlier this week that he would be a “law and order” president, despite a lengthy history of criminality, sources…
In the ’80s, American Neo-Nazis targetted the hardcore punk scene for recruitment. Why they thought they’d find success among a group of angry and disenfranchised…
I take my voting seriously. I’m not one of these people who believe in protest votes. Too many scene veterans gave up their lives and…
WASHINGTON — Democratic presidential frontrunner Joe. Biden allegedly checked in with former President Barack Obama ahead of an upcoming debate to get his opinion on…
UNITED STATES — After years and countless experience points towards progression, America has finally reached a high enough level to evolve to its next form.…
With the 2020 election cycle heating up, it’s impossible to go a single day without hearing about Bernie Sanders, the “progressive” who promises to radically…
WASHINGTON — Democratic National Committee officials are reportedly scrambling to fix their Vote Blue Matter Who campaign now that it has inspired millions around the…