LONDON — A group of scientists from the British Institute of Music Technologies released a bombshell report predicting that unless drastic measures are taken, the…
STANFORD, Calif. — Scientists from Stanford University’s Center for Social Climate Research issued a new report claiming that women wearing band shirts may be asked…
DENVER — A multinational non-renewable energy corporation is attempting to pin all of Earth’s environmental problems on an individual from Colorado, according to sources who…
MADISON, Wis. — The University of Wisconsin’s Center for Climatic Research released a damning report suggesting that almost 70 percent of all carbon emissions are…
VERNON, Calif. — Top executives representing oil companies around the country remain concerned that they will not have enough soldiers to fight for non-renewable resources…
LAFAYETTE, Ind. — Leading climate analysts at Purdue University are warning that global warming could cause Weezer’s Blue Album to be entirely red by 2035,…
LOS ANGELES – Ticketing giant Ticketmaster announced they will be tacking on a new “preemptive heatstroke treatment” fee to all concert tickets in the wake…
COLUMBUS, Ohio – Superhero and crusader for the environment Captain Planet is reportedly ready to throw in the towel on his quest to conserve nature’s…
Please allow me to introduce myself, I’m a man concerned with global warming. My name is Orlov von Maximoff, a former Romanian count, but you…
By our current projections, there will be 9.8 billion people on the planet by 2050. With such exponential population growth and World War 3 just…
BROOK, Ind. – Research conducted at one of the nation’s largest landfill facilities showed that discarded Blues Traveler “Four” CDs make up over 70% of…
As the world’s climate changes, certain sacrifices must be made, but why should the burden fall on man alone? We’re already drinking out of cardboard…
Science nerds will tell you that climate change is an existential threat to our world, but more importantly, to our corporations. That being the case,…
There are so many things to hate about this entitled millennial generation, but nothing scorches my sky more than their addiction to technology. These ungrateful…
OLYMPIA, Wash. — Local activist and aging vegan Victor Gonzalez expressed his disappointment that the new generation of vegans have no interest in brutal videos…