CHICAGO — Punk band Doormat’s frontman promised last night that the band would “for sure” play their bassist’s song, “The Mason-Dixon Lie,” at their next…
GILMAN HOT SPRINGS, Calif. — Every single member of the Church of Scientology were found last week to be undercover documentary filmmakers who only joined…
WAYNE, N.J. — World-renowned MILF Stacy’s mom, made famous by rock band Fountains of Wayne, died suddenly last night due to a heart attack at…
MILWAUKEE — Iconic motorcycle manufacturer Harley-Davidson held a press conference this morning, announcing plans to build fixed gear motorcycles to gain favor with a new,…
We live in a progressive time. The days of mediocre white men dominating the media are coming to an end. As a straight white male…
ERIE, Pa. — Punk sales associate Courtney Cruz is refusing to start her six-hour shift at Target until the store “actually fills up a little…
BUFFALO, N.Y. — Warped Tour founder Kevin Lyman is already eyeing Riot Fest 2020 for a possible reunion of his famed festival, nearly one year…
ATHENS, Ga. — Local punk Ramon Dixon told himself this morning that the insect he caught crawling across his bed, and that is “definitely responsible”…
No matter how many gallons of twenty-somethings’ blood we inject, everybody still gets old and shitty. That goes double for so-called “classic songs.” Just because…
ATHENS, Ga. — Local punk Ramon Dixon has officially decided he’ll “give it a few days” before telling his roommates about the weird bites found…
ABINGTON, Mass. — The 14 punks that make up the entire DIY music scene of their suburban town are reportedly relieved to soon be done…
It can be hard to get the most out of GarageBand. Luckily, Hard Times has teamed up with young GarageBand expert Alex to create a…
For generations dinosaurs have fascinated humans, but our perception of these prehistoric creatures has been severely warped by pop culture. None more so than the…
Wow! That was some dance number, kids. This funky fresh fundraiser to save your local youth center has been something! I’ve been watching you inspirational,…
ANN ARBOR, Mich. — Liza Epperson realized yesterday that her new girlfriend, who allegedly described herself as “emo” in her Tinder bio, more closely resembles…