SEATTLE — Local amateur groupie Sarah Pepper is reportedly horrified after accidentally sleeping with the deceased body lying behind a local bar’s PA system. “I…
When 10-year-old Jackson Tolbert’s teacher told her students to write an essay about their “hero,” she expected most of them would choose athletes, action heroes,…
EUGENE, Ore. — Local punk Randy “Dirty Randy” Lopez made a surprisingly well-thought-out and articulated case for the Chrysler PT Cruiser as a counter-culture icon,…
According to some fans, “The Simpsons” has predicted numerous future events, including the election of Donald Trump and a tiger attack of Siegfried and Roy.…
NEW YORK — Jezebel writer Cara Olson has reportedly been ‘methodical’ and ‘giddy’ in her attempt to find something problematic about the critically acclaimed HBO…
WASHINGTON — Fox News host Tucker Carlson used the 1981 Dead Kennedys song “Nazi Punks Fuck Off” as one of the first examples of cancel…
Did you hear about Death Metal Dave? Yeah, he got ANOTHER job. Ever since he slammed on a lame-ass frontside boardslide on the flatbar at…
LONDON — American ska band Big Potatoes recently caused the worst traffic jam in UK history while attempting to incorporate every band member in a…
I’ve always found it strange that people need a device to beep them awake. Partially because that sounds like such a harsh way to start…
BETHESDA, Md. — Local resident Emily Spencer suffered through yet another flavorless meal when friend Darrien Thomas announced that he could only go somewhere with…
Getting to interview rock legends is bar none the coolest perk to being a music journalist. When a chance to interview Jethro Tull fell on…
NEW YORK — Broadway’s newest jukebox musical, “Beyond Butterfly,” featuring the music of early 2000s rap-rock band Crazy Town, opened at the Winter Garden Theatre…
INDIANAPOLIS — National Guard veteran Katy Hawkins is reportedly still suffering from traumatic memories of attempting to navigate the benefits owed to her by the…
Genetics is a roll of the dice, especially during puberty. Some of us developed early. Some developed late. The only commonality was that we all…
LAS CRUCES, N.M — Several local teens mocking adult man Terry Rothstein at the Mesilla Valley Mall have inadvertently caused him to work to improve…