Jeff Sessions’ crusade against marijuana is damaging to the American economy, harmful to our healthcare system, and totally blows chunks for the band 311. Sessions,…
Enough is enough. When they came for my haircut (a slicked back undercut) I didn’t say anything. Yes, I know, it was a hitler youth…
HELL – Local Angel of Darkness, Satan, gifted metal icons Slayer with an 18-karat gold watch as a thank you for their 37 years of…
WASHINGTON — Police officers broke up a rowdy Capitol Hill gathering early Saturday morning after receiving noise complaints from several neighbors, multiple sources report. “Shit,…
WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump visited a White House doctor this week for his annual physical examination as part of his free, government-subsidized health care and…
I think it’s more important than ever, in these chaotic times, that we maintain our right as Americans to arm ourselves in self-defense. That’s why…
LOS ANGELES — Rage Against the Machine vocalist and Planet Fitness member Zack de la Rocha finds his workout motivation by listening to House of…
DENVER — Local all-around garbage human Russ Mitchell was totally grossed out by a female musician’s armpit hair during a show on Tuesday night, according…
EARTH, Milky Way Galaxy — 2017 announced its resignation as our current year earlier today amidst numerous allegations of gross misconduct. “I’ve let a lot…
KNOXVILLE, Tenn. — Local libertarian Peter Murphy faced off against and won a rousing debate last night against his radical, left-wing activist girlfriend who doesn’t…
MEMPHIS, Tenn. — Local PC punk band Ally Brats played a touching tribute at the Hi Tone last Friday to their deceased punk hero Jay…
BALTIMORE — Researchers at Johns Hopkins University released a study today, proving that the average guitar player swallows up to eight guitar picks every year.…
Owning a home is an immense responsibility, especially in an economy still recovering from last decade’s housing market crash. As a homeowner myself, I can…
SANTA FE SPRINGS, Calif. — Hundreds of concertgoers came forward this week, accusing the famed Warped Tour festival of enticing them to a litter-strewn field…
AMERICA — Americans across the nation are struggling to remember their previous holiday traditions as they prep for their first Christmas season after eight years…