MINNEAPOLIS — Mike Curry, a local father and devoted straight-edge punk, resorted to unconventional means after discovering his son had been using marijuana, horrified sources…
PORTLAND, Ore.—Sage Copeland, who has never driven a day in his life, is adamant that his automobile abstinence is an environmental thing and nothing else,…
BOSTON — Members of local straight edge band Hard Pass reportedly broke edge in front of a small crowd within minutes of taking the stage…
So you hit up the Taco Bell Cantina happy hour with some co-workers, slammed spicy margs till last call, were forcibly removed from the premises,…
SEATTLE, Wash. — Newly sober punk Dustin Patterson swore off alcohol after he experienced his first-ever bowel movement with a single, clean wipe, confirmed sources…
BALTIMORE – Party guests reacted with visceral horror upon realizing their host intentionally purchased and offered them nearly 16 dozen cans of god awful flavored…
It’s an annual tradition for the straight edge scene elders to convene and discuss potential rule changes to make being straight edge less appealing and…
SYRACUSE, N.Y. — Local 20-year-old hardcore kid Cody Macklin remains ignorant to the fact that he is celebrating his last Edge Day this year, disappointed,…
BOSTON — Music fan Sean Tanner was nearly bankrupted after a wild night of slamming seltzer at a recent Jeff Rosenstock show, sources close to…
DENVER — Local baker Charlotte Donovan, who specializes in vegan gluten-free baked goods, reported that she almost forgot to add a secret moisture-evaporating ingredient that…
CHICAGO — Self-described “gay edge” punk Connor Hensley sparked controversy by abstaining from alcohol and recreational drugs with the notable exception of alkyl nitrites known…
LAS VEGAS — Lifelong straight edger Logan McGuire spent the majority of his future brother-in-law’s bachelor party convincing the stripper to go vegan, despite being…
SAN DIEGO — Members of the vegan hardcore band Right Side were reportedly forced to settle for a pescatarian bass player after their hunt for…
SEATTLE — Ostentatious little showboat David Farrow is spending all of January completely abstinent from alcohol without the looming threat of incarceration, vexed sources confirmed.…
AMHERST, Mass. — Local vegan recording engineer Tyson McNally came under fire from the audio community for covering his home studio walls with empty JUST…