There is something that’s been bothering me for nearly 20 years now, and I’m sure a few of you may have had sleepless nights over…
PHILADELPHIA — Local band Pugilist came under intense scrutiny within the Oi! scene due to the fact that nowhere does the word “cock” exist in…
WEBSTER, N.Y. — Leading music experts unanimously agreed that arguments between fans over which metal bands are considered to be part of which subgenres is…
ATLANTA — A bombshell accusation was made against so-called do-it-yourself band Slither In which revealed the band bought premade instruments for which they use to…
WASHINGTON — The American Psychiatric Association at its annual conference announced it added “poser” to the latest update of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of…
DETROIT — Supposed diehard Slayer fan James Denninger was released from prison this weekend much earlier than expected due to good behavior, confirmed shocked and…
PHILADELPHIA — A local hardcore crew embarrassed themselves publicly after posting an incredibly weak crew pic, their first since COVID restrictions were lifted, multiple sources…
BUFFALO, N.Y. — Local punk and Carhartt jacket-wearing dilettante Anthony Lynch avoided eye contact with fellow diners at a restaurant last night after a waiter…
POCATELLO, Idaho — Local punk Tyler Christensen was purged from the punk community after it was discovered that he had been approved for a Discover…
LOS ANGELES — Aging punk Mike Cruz was ordered by the Council of Punk Legitimacy to inform his neighbors that he is a registered poser…
TACOMA, Wash. — The funeral for moderately popular local musician Adam Klein was rather well-attended despite being held on a Tuesday night, sources who waited…
PORTLAND, Ore. — A comprehensive study by independent researchers at SceneStats confirmed that posers are the sole reason DIY music scenes across the country are…
ROCKFORD, Ill. — Chicago punk Robbie Kaplan called attendees of last weekend’s Levin-Brady wedding ‘whiny posers’ and ‘crybabies’ as he was forcibly removed for repeated…
Across the country, region to region, state to state, city to city, every scene is different. From the bands to the venues, everyone is has…
Let’s get something straight, you fucking posers. I’m not some goddamn weekend warrior; I’m in this for the long haul. I actually give a shit…