HAZLEHURST, Miss. — Indie horror movie “The Scary Place” is leaving primarily Republican audiences in freshly shitted-and pissed-in pants due to its terrifying, uneventful depictions…
LITTLE ROCK, Ark. — Governor Sarah Huckabee Sanders claimed another victory after signing a bill allowing parents to leave their children locked in vehicles on…
MENDHAM TOWNSHIP, N.J. — Florida governor Ron DeSantis awoke the morning after a GOP presidential hopeful slumber party to discover the word “WOKE” written on…
MILWAUKEE — Local third-grade teacher Grace Redding recently stated she “would not trade her job for the world” despite the constant toll it takes on…
CALHOUN, Ga. — Irate Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene began drafting articles of impeachment against staff at the Applebee’s restaurant when her order didn’t appear in…
CHAGRIN FALLS, Ohio — Leftist senior citizen Cyrus Novak is reportedly under round-the-clock duress from continuously having to make sure John Fogerty is not somehow…
BROUSSARD, La. — Gun store owners across the country reported the need to cut costs as summer break ushers in the start of a decline…
WASHINGTON — Elected officials across the country promised they would spend the rest of Pride month drafting legislation targeted at making life a living hell…
No one criticizes leftists more than other leftists, and ever since I told my DSA working group that I enjoy the smash hit series “Yellowstone,”…
WASHINGTON — Ailing Senator Dianne Feinstein worried Senate colleagues when she made shocking remarks defending Michale Graves’ tenure fronting the Misfits, horrified Washington insiders have…
PHILADELPHIA – Local man Travis Burnett revealed to his roommates this week that, without immediate intervention and deal making, he is going to reach his…
WASHINGTON — Ousted Fox News personality Tucker Carlson is looking for a new gig which would allow more freedom for the racist diatribes that shaped…
WASHINGTON – An audit of Supreme Court merchandise sales revealed that Justice Clarence Thomas pocketed roughly half the proceeds while failing to disclose said income…
PURGATORY — The afterlife faced a major shake-up after the Angel of Death was placed on administrative leave for his failure to kill GOP Senator…
Even though we’re a few years out from the 2024 election, that doesn’t mean we can’t breathlessly speculate on who the GOP will run. Considering…