Brendan Krick
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GRAND RAPIDS, Mich. — Local woman Brittany Mullins instructed her punk boyfriend Miles Blanchard not to mention his job, band,…
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Patrick Crooks
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PALO ALTO, Calif. — Scientists for Tesla’s robotics team have reported that recent requests from senior management indicate that they…
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Nathan Kamal
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Dads are lame. Even if your dad can occasionally impart a life lesson or bring you a case of toilet…
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Robert John Scucci
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Jacksonville, Fla. — Local part-time dad Deryk Hoyt was disappointed by how far from completion his half-sleeve was after spending…
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Dan Rice
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Breaking up with someone is always difficult, but at least when you’re ending a romantic relationship there is a template…
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Nathan Kamal
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Hi. You don’t know me, but you probably know the child I once was. Jumping around in a bedroom. Windmilling…
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Dianne Nora
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CINCINNATI — Your Mom is wondering if you'll be home for her annual 4th of July barbecue, or if you'll…
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Ryan Danley
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PHOENIX — Local punk and licensed therapist Dr. Tim “Roach” Rochestky, LPCC, suggested that a patient kick his square fuckhead…
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Tony Morse
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BOSTON — Local therapist Dr. Loic Middleberry attempted to reach new clients by introducing reduced-rate services for sessions focusing exclusively…
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Patrick Coyne
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BALLARD RESIDENCE — A disturbing and highly scientific new study has found that I, Gary Ballard, the extremely parched breadwinner…
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