I’m balding! And I’m super nervous in general. I’m only 39 and I’ve had my prostate checked eight times. I’m a nervous bald guy! I’m…
NEW YORK — Stock photo websites jacked up their prices today for pictures of financial workers on Wall Street looking dejected on the trading floor…
WASHINGTON — A large, bi-partisan coalition of U.S. Senators disclosed moments ago that they’d been avoiding Sen. Rand Paul long before his recent COVID-19 diagnosis.…
YUBA CITY, Calif. — A reported breach in self-quarantine last week has left four dead and another two hospitalized after a fit of contagious laughter…
SANTA MONICA, Calif. — With the continuing spread of the COVID-19 pandemic and nonessential businesses being asked to send workers home and close their doors,…
CHICAGO — Local punk Allen Prestigiacomo is now unemployed from home, thanks to Illinois Governor J.B. Pritzker’s decree forcing bars and dine-in restaurants to close…
I’ve always wanted to travel but it’s so expensive. Airfare, lodging, food; it all adds up very quickly. Anytime I saw those posts online about…
ATLANTA — Local World of Warcraft player John Fleming was on his 32nd day of self quarantining when he learned about the COVID-19 pandemic early…
SEATTLE — Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos announced today he is committing $10 billion of his vast personal fortune to completely eradicate the threat of coronavirus…
WASHINGTON — President Trump held a press conference this morning to drink a full cup of COVID-19, hoping the gesture will calm the nerves of…
Did they cancel your band’s show this weekend because of the quarantine? Ah, stinker! And this was the one I was definitely, for sure planning…
LOS ANGELES — Local metalhead Layne Medema spoke with a representative from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention hotline for well over an hour…
NEW YORK — The Carfax Car Fox TV mascot shocked the world this past Monday as the latest to be diagnosed with the COVID-19 virus.…
NEW ROCHELLE, N.Y. — Local gamer Mindy Cunningham, currently in preventive self-quarantine due to the coronavirus outbreak, has become so desperate for games to play…
PORTLAND, Maine — Residents of local punk house the Fire Trap added more tap water today to the house’s already severely diluted bottle of Dr.…