LOUISVILLE, Ky. — Local weirdo Arnold Hauser posted on the popular community app, Nextdoor, that everyone in his neighborhood is safe around him because he…
Jesus of Nazareth was undeniably one of the most influential figures in human history. His message of love and compassion (later rebranded as xenophobia and…
JERUSALEM — Archeologists from Brown University made a bombshell discovery late last week in a long-lost scripture describing Jesus being super rude to the waiter…
Body mods have come a long way. Once a social oddity, it is now common to see piercings and tattoos on people in many walks…
Let’s go places, with our faith. Was it not Christ’s anger at the money changers during the cleansing of the temple that inspired the very…
WASHINGTON — A new study released last week by the Pew Research Center suggests that nearly 12% fewer Americans identify as Christ reborn compared to…
JERUSALEM — Local punk and Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ is reportedly running “an hour late, 90 minutes tops, bro” to rise at his own…
BETHLEHEM — A local show billed as “The Most Important Event in Human History” reportedly ended as a “total fucking bust,” thanks to a confusing…
VATICAN CITY — Bible Scholars have determined that Jesus Christ’s hand injuries, previously thought to have been caused by crucifixion, were actually the result of…
Upon entering my local Starbucks this week, I heard a catchy tune playing over the speakers. The voice sounded powerful and familiar, so I asked…
LANSING, Mich. — The frontman of Christian metalcore band Kiss Me Judas predicted last night that one of his bandmates would soon betray him, confirmed…
God’s only son Jesus Christ was reportedly disturbed by the recent post-fight interview with Kyle “Mad Dog” Helmer, in which the fighter, who was accused…
BOSTON – Attendees of a Sunday hardcore matinee were both stunned and blessed to witness the resurrection of revered holy figure Jesus Christ. Christ, 33,…
JERUSALEM— Nardwuar, the Human Serviette, known for his well-researched interviews and thoughtful gifts for his interviewees shocked his latest subject, Jesus Christ, with the original…