SOMERVILLE, Mass. — Local man Malcolm Evans recently purchased a limited edition $200 red and gold swirl copy of “Jane Doe” and plays it nonstop…
OMAHA, Neb. — Local guitarist Sebastian Melendez purchases the most inexpensive PA at his regular music equipment store following a detailed, four-hour description of every…
SAN FERNANDO, Calif. — A new report from the Federal Reserve Bank of Los Angeles showed that unprecedented inflation is forcing adult entertainers to have…
YORBA LINDA, Calif. — Sony Music Group announced the acquisition of all recorded works and songwriting property of metalcore outfit Atreyu in a staggering deal…
OAKLAND, Calif. — Local punk Lenny Hanna is reportedly attempting to rent out a room in his flop-house by telling tenants they may eventually be…
BOSTON — Local landlord Viktor Lind used his precious time and resources to add a fresh coat of paint to a dead mouse in the…
NEW YORK — Members of Racked Brain returned from a weekend “tour” and immediately began telling their friends tales of a “packed and absolutely bonkers”…
NORFOLK — A recent report found that copies of the photo zine, Put It All On Red, are still available despite initial claims 18 months…
CHICAGO — Local punk Jacob Brown found his net worth has skyrocketed now that drink tickets are redeemable again at reopened venues across the city,…
HOLLYWOOD, Calif. — Acclaimed filmmaker Christopher Nolan responded to critics this week after his production of a 60-second birthday shoutout on Cameo ran approximately $10…
PORTLAND, Ore. — The local apartment complex Oakwood Estates is allegedly really liberal with their definition of the term “estates,” according to sources who took…
BROOKLYN, N.Y. — Music fan Laura Kesrick’s insecurities were confirmed yesterday after discovering an alarming number of favorite albums in the dollar bin of local…
WEST PALM BEACH, Fla. — A burrito purchased at a local 7-11 today was beyond repulsed by the disgusting schlub who bought and consumed it,…
GAS CITY, Ind. — The ninth day of a Midwestern loop for touring band Kings of Ithaca was also the 15th consecutive day for each…
WILKES-BARRE, Pa. — Local punk band Strangle Parade replaced the front axle on their tour van yesterday, with frontman Geoff Armstrong reportedly spending his “entire…