OAKLAND — A first date at a crowded DIY basement show is going about “as good as one would expect,” witnesses close to the tentative…
OAKLAND — Blackened crust band DEATH BIRD has penned an extensive, preemptive apology note to their community before writing any music, dismissive sources confirmed today.…
ATLANTA — Matt Goldberg, 27, has used Twitter, Steam reviews, and several other online platforms to advocate for a new feature in PlayerUnknown’s Battlegrounds: a…
WHITE PLAINS, N.Y. — Local punk band The Gutter Owls were forced to push their New Year’s Eve headlining set from 11:59 p.m. to 12:30…
Mark was one hell of a guy. He was the kind of guy you could come to in times of need, in times of celebration,…
SALEM, Mass. — The parents of goth teenager Thomas Sullivan are uncertain how to properly stuff their son’s fishnet Christmas stocking, sources close to the…
It looks like fans of brand synergy will have to wait quite a while for their dream film to see the light of day. An…
Shocking revelation alert! Talking Dead guest, Melissa McBride, who plays The Walking Dead’s badass survive-at-any-costs mother figure “Carol,” reportedly stopped watching the show two seasons…
OK, White women besides me, we need to talk: you need to open your eyes and stop. Doing. These. Five. Things. Full stop. 1. You…
Look, maybe I don’t dress like it anymore, or go to shows often (or ever), but that doesn’t mean I’m not punk anymore. I’m still…
There are a lot of reasons why I don’t tell people I’m a squirter. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, but it’s not like I…
My name is Bert Wilson and I have a message for NFL commissioner Roger Goodell: put an end to all end zone celebrations. If they…
HANSON, Mass. — Local punk Brandon Gardner will continue his annual Thanksgiving tradition of hiding from his family in his aunt’s garage, Gardner himself confirmed…
WASHINGTON — A new wave of allegations was brought against President Trump today, now under investigation for pardoning a turkey with direct ties to Russian…
MADISON, Wis. — Local gamer Matt Sameson has reportedly spent over $5,000 for the ability to turn up whatever anti-aliasing is. Sameson accomplished this by…