Punk Couple Names Baby “Mark/Jessica Split”
ARLINGTON, Va. — Punk lifers Jessica Greene and Mark Wallace set a new standard for punk baby names when they…
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John Danek — Page 29
436 stories found
Opinion: Ya Know, Stacy’s Dad Ain’t Half Bad Either
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Stacy’s mom is hot as shit. I’ve heard; you’ve heard; the entire world has heard. And they’re…
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Valorant Player a Disappointment to All His Friends in Real Life Too
GREENSBORO, N.C. — Local gamer Harry Olsen continues to frustrate his friends with a total lack of awareness and poor…
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B.C. Rich Guitars Expands Business to Pointy, Blood-Soaked Clarinets
LOS ANGELES — B.C. Rich, a company famous for making electric guitars popular in the heavy metal music scene, will…
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Band Breaks Quarantine to Meet Up Together, Talk Shit on Bassist
LOS ANGELES — Three members of local punk quartet The Herniated Dicks defied Los Angeles’ stringent coronavirus quarantine guidelines to…
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God Frantically Skims Bible for Reason To Reject Dead Straight Edger From Heaven
HEAVEN — God, the almighty creator of Heaven and Earth, can not find a single reason to refuse recently-deceased straight…
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Doyle Wolfgang von Frankenstein Releases 90-Second Guitar MasterClass
SAN FRANCISCO — The popular, celebrity-driven tutorial platform MasterClass released a series today from Misfits’ guitarist Doyle Wolfgang von Frankenstein,…
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We Sit Down With the Composer Who Only Uses Distorted Bass Notes to Make Soundtracks for YouTube Conspiracy Videos
Conspiracy theories are more popular than ever, and their success can be boiled down to one basic ingredient: ominous, distorted…
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We Interviewed the Hives Who Really Should Have Told Us They Were Actually the Vines
Early 2000s indie was a unique time- we all thought that quirky guitar riffs, danceable drum beats, and iPod commercials…
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“Good Cop Bad Cop” Technique Rebranded As “Accomplice Cop, Murderer Cop”
MINNEAPOLIS — Law enforcement officials have renamed the interrogation tactic “Good Cop, Bad Cop” to “Accomplice Cop, Murderer Cop” to…
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